yiling

homework on the first day of school

2012-02-12T18:39:00.002+08:00

such is the life of a victorian, or that of any pre-university student.

so school has officially started. that means the end of orientation and the beginning of countless lectures and tutorials that just drone on and on and on and on...

i was half an hour late for class on tuesday, the first official day of school. if this were to get into any of my ex teachers ears it would definitely not be pleasant. actually i reached the school gate 10 mins after the bell rang, but was kept standing there, feeding flies and listening to the management in-charge lecture us for 20 minutes. but thankfully vj does not have a very distinct demerit system (unlikecoughsscgscoughs), your parents will just be issued a warning letter after mutiple times of latecoming or offences. and as far as i'm concerened, i'm not someone who would commit so significant offences that a warning letter would be sent to home. probably just latecoming (of which i was booked for thrice in sec 4, resulting in my 6 demerit points that i've somehow neevr paid detention for hahahaha) but that my mother probably would know of beforehand.

anyway tutorials are fine. but lectures are crazily fast and chim that its hard to be on the same page and pace with the lecturer. but vj, homework is very slack. they only mark (in other words, you only need to hand in) assignments probably a few times each term. the other homework or rather, practices, are all supposed to be done on your own by continuous self-check, self-discipline or for most of the cases, peer pressure. so i guess in that aspect its more relaxing for teachers don't put too much attention on you. but one has to be mindful and not go overboard with the freedom. this, is probably the main difference between sc and vj.

chem and math sucks like shit. the only lessons i'm enjoying (or not complaining about) now are history econs gp and perhaps PW if i get a fun group. ^^

i realise i use brackets a lot. but am i even using it correctly, i don't know. hang on

screw this i just wiki-ed 'bracket' and they start giving me parentheses (), curly brackets, chevrons and square brackets and some other shit. the only definition available is "Brackets are tall punctuation marks used in matched pairs within text, to set apart or interject other text."

which is basically what i'm doing right? so let's assume my use of brackets is correct.

my class is fine, as i've said before. we got closer together after spending an hour in the sea at ecp on friday while getting our faces and arms burnt. not extremely close yet but i think everything takes time so... we'll see.

met up with OG on friday at suntec!! by far the most fun event of the year. mass dancing at suntec and going around the fountain of wealth in human trains screaming things like "cyclops!" , "62!", "C1!" and most importantly, "sc-gs!" OG mates are fun people to be with i wish we can really meet up every month or at least a few times per year! i hate how we're all in different classes and separated that i don't even see all of them around.

ccas currenly are the worst part of jc life. kind of ironic because that used to be the best thing that happened to me in scgs! but well i guess not wanting to join choir again has its consequences. i tried for track and field and didn't get in (overestimation of my abilities here hahahaha) and right now i have ODAC, dance, photography, table tennis under my sign up sheet. i did sign up for cross country as well but that must have occured when my brain was filled with bullshit or sth.

pe in vj is the craziest lesson ever. doesn't help when you get the strictest teacher in town. ran 3.2k at ecp the first pe lesson and did some rounds and shit drills (20 push ups, 40 sit ups, 40 bending up and jumping back shit) at 5 o' clock in the afternoon during remedial pe. seriously i hope i'll pass the mock napfa if not i'll have to stay back every thurs sweating my ass off. but i doubt so because my standing broad jump and pull ups are freaking shit.

ok i'm done here. school tomorrow again! i'll be posting soon.

drowning in my sweat... and a bit of rain (eew)

2012-02-06T19:33:00.005+08:00

so i just came home from running.

well it started pouring halfway and i had to take shelter at some under the highway shit just at the side of the jogging track. i rather like the feeling of sweat drops and rain drops both falling on me together, but i think once is enough for sometimes the rain really blurs your vision and dampens your running morale (no matter how much a person can like rain). worst of all, sometimes when a droplet of what seems to be rain touches your lips, instead of tasting refreshing precipitation (..) from the heavens, you taste something a little more salty and a little more unappealing. well then you realised you actually tasted your sweat and accompanied with the tiredness after jogging for a long time, it just starts to go downhill from there.

but actually i thank the rain today for it has made me run more than i thought i could accomplish. i haven't ran since.. goodness knows when. like one month ago? (and that before that one incident i haven't ran since november)

when the seniors said "nobody in vj is unfit", i literally went 'shit!' in my head because i know, no matter how much i seem very sporty, i am not. my standing broad jump is just... pathetic. very miserable grades and everything is just.. gross. but i don't wanna go for remedial pe! (yeah there's such thing in vj, basically you stay back during the afternoons to work out)

oh and did i say. apparently my first few pe lessons are going to be spent running because VJ takes part in this cross country shit annually. which means, we have to train to run to complete the run. urgh! no wonder nobody in vj is unfit!

anyway lessons and lectures officially start tomorrow and walao this is shit. i want to play more damn it! but thankfully my class is doing fine, just that i think we could be closer even more. but we have time so ^^ i miss my OG (cyclops 1!!!) so damn much though :( it sucks that when you're just getting used to these people, you have to be separated into your classes and who knows when you'll meet up again! thank goodness we have this suntec mass dance thing this friday where i would be able to wear my cyclops badge again! but apart from that, i hope C1 continues to meet up!!

i feel like i'll blabber if i continue on! so i'll just end it here with a really interesting thing i found on 9gag ^^

VJO'12 (CYCLOPS!!!)

2012-02-04T18:30:00.007+08:00

ayye, just a copy over from pei's style of blogging, the author here is still currently not used to being branded as a victorian. there's always this part of my heart that clutches and shrinks back a little when i scream "VICTORIA!", or when the emcee addresses us as victorians. whenever that happens, my mind automatically shifts to scgs, being called 'kim geks' during assemblies those mornings not long before. the 'kim geks' that tina neoh or any other overly-enthusiastic teacher (or principal) call us used to be cringe-worthy, but now, it has become a little endearing.

to be honest, even though i complain a lot about sc and sc's screwed up (or not, now i think) education system, sc has been good to me no doubt. she has given me friends that will stay for life, teachers that are so damn dedicated and patient as well as all the help i need to excel in both my academic and non-academic areas. so here i thank scgs and swear that i'll always remember sc.

but that being said, its not like VJ's been bad to me.

in fact, VJ has been so much better than expected. up to the extent where it has caused my regret of not getting into HCI to die down so much that it now only takes up a pathetic less than a percent of my thoughts.

the first day of orientation on tuesday started with so much apprehension than excitement. but more of the latter took over when i realised farisha was my OGL. and then we were introduced to our other 2 ogls, ian and yong siang who i now feel are the most patient and helpful and enthusiastic ogls ever. without them, or if i had really sucky and heck carey ogls, i'm sure i'll still be wallowing in self pity of not going into hci or more seriously, blame vj for stealing my choice away. that would really suck up my 2 years being there.

on the first day, everyone was still so foreign with each other that we barely talked or dared to speak a little louder. my OG (CYCLOPS 1!!!! or rather, 洗碗）consists of ... (hang on while i sort out all the names) Junyu, Emma, Qiong Hua, Qiu Ran, Qing Ying, Crystal, Isha, Jocelyn, Huicong, Pinyi, Guang Ming, Adrian, Rahul, Ammar and Justinian, who joined on the 2nd day. ^^ actually its not like any of these names will make sense to you unless you're from cyclops (CYCLOPS!!!) but i thought i'll just list them out because they are worth it.

but yeah, thankfully on the second day, we got closer. 2nd day was the day of wet and dirty games. we dunked our faces in flour while using our lips to search out tic tacs, sat on a combination of fountain water, tomato sauce, soy sauce and who knows what else, smashed and being smashed with water bombs, ran and rolled in soap water and got all hot, sweaty, sticky, wet and dirty. but well we opened up more and cheered significantly louder than the first day. and then we went to the airport for dinner, which ended up in more games and forfeits.

third day was more games and boring sleepy talks and somewhere in the morning, we learnt some mass dances. after lunch we were asked to gather in our classes (woo 12s62!!!) and i'm glad to say, my class is fine ^^. 'fine' should be said in the trolling way with eyebrows raised but not with a straight face. fine i meant this face.

which means, my class is turning up awesome. hahaha guys can really liven up the mood and make everything funny instead of screamy. and then we went back to our OGs and by then, i've developed a strong liking for C1 that i'm pretty sure i'll miss C1 damn alot when we separate.

and indeed, on the fourth day when we spent the whole morning and half the afternoon with our class, i did miss them. its this dependence you have on them because they're your first few friends in a foreign land you know. plus, it doesn't help that they are actually all awesome people. i really want C1 to stay together and meet up every third sat of the month or something. they're really really nice friends!!

so well this post is turning up really long winded and shit so i'm going to end this soon. even though we suffocated in the hall that stank of sweat and shoes and humidity, even though we were all people from different places just gathered together for barely a few days, even though i was allocated to my second choice, i'm really glad i ended up in vj (even though travelling is hell of a b****). so much that i'm already anticipating next monday (that has never happened in my entire schooling life i swear) and seeing both of OG mates and classmates.

so there. roughly the sum up for everything. oh and did i mention, cyclops (CYCLOPS!!!) emerged third (of 8) overall! that's damn freaking awesome! its a great start to a great year ^^

right so i'll see you guys around. for those who didn't get into their first choice (which surprisingly is a lot this year), don't be disappointed anymore because its really useless to be sad over something that cannot be helped anymore.

since MOE trolled you, troll back.

sucks

2012-01-30T20:35:00.002+08:00

to be suffering from school blues.

man i'm currently getting the its-sunday-night-tmr-is-monday feeling! just 10 times worse. plus going into such a foreign territory, travelling so far, in sc uniform (*^^$^%$#@*)(*(&$

i still want to play. i have not played enough! omg hate this hate this i don't want school to bloody start. once tmr comes, its 2 years of continuous hell.

poly people stop gloating.

omg school school school school school school scares the freak out of me.

plus i haven't done so many things yet!

and i want to stay up late more!!! i can never do that again!! (for entertainment purposes)

ok whatever bye

the first drama of the dragon

2012-01-30T18:15:00.005+08:00

so today i woke up to my mother barging into my room at 7.59am while announcing its 8 o' clock and that the computer is already switched on for me to check my posting results.

so while i quickly got over my first reaction of 'what the hell , i quickly remembered that the phone beside me would contain the answer that both my mother and i are dying to know for. and so i picked up the phone and unlocked it.

'2 new messages'.

the one shown on the screen was by the number 74+++ and i thought it was just a damn nokia commercial. but when i opened the message, i saw the command from MOE, calling me KWOK YI LING in freaking CAPS (seriously why so serious moe do you know not all people can wake up and handle a CAPS command from the ministry a few seconds after they wake up) and freaking ordered me to report tomorrow at 7.30am at .... victoria junior college.

a few nanoseconds after my brain registered the msg, i asked myself: so am i happy or not. for another few nanoseconds, i thought, why this is not bad! vjc! and suddenly it striked me that i wanted to go to hwachong and then the thought of taking an hour's long bus ride and waking up at inhumane hours in the morning conveniently struck me as well.

and so one second after my brain registered the msg, i went 'crap'.

so it was only then that i realised how much i wanted to go to hwachong. i mean, vj's fine, but the distance is kind of putting me off right now. i wouldn't mind the culture in vj, but why forgo hwachong when you can get there?

and then the whole morning passed in a blurred frenzy. my mum took a half day leave, and while i'm still processing and accepting the fact that i have to go to vj tomorrow, the preparation of the appeal form and relevant certificates already unconsciously began. during which, i got into a slight arguement with my mum because i was supposed to go back to zhenghua for a visit at 10.30 but she asked me to prioritise. we screamed a few words and i kind of shut her out and broke down (for a mere few seconds) under the pressure of the freaking appeal shit but also wanting to honour my word about going back to zhps.

thankfully everything was prepared by 10 and me and my mum came up with a win-win situation. while i can keep my word and visit mdm neo, it has only to be until 11. and after which i would immediately head to hci to hand in the appeal form. so yup. everything ended by 12 noon and we headed over to bpp for lunch and then we parted. (she returned to work while i went to buy the necessary for the start of school)

in the end, i'm really thankful for my mother for taking the half day off. i think she was more disappointed than i was when i told her i was heading to vj. i'm pretty sure i would have freaked out or might have just abandoned the appeal and accept my vj fate if she wasn't here. plus getting into hci was so pressurising and thankfully and gratefully, she was there. i thanked her ^^

vjc is less unappealing now as the day pass. but as much as the weariness of the thought of going to vj fades, the want to go into hci just gets stronger.

but whatever it is, nothing more can be done for everything lies with hci. the results, according to the receptionist, is coming out tomorrow evening. so until then, i pray and pray and hope that my portfolio would attract them to accept me into their instituition.

ps: i swear - the first 7 paragraphs are real. i really felt whatever i wrote. the emotions, the thoughts whatsoever.

农历兔年的最后一天

2012-01-22T10:47:00.003+08:00

今年的农历新年来的特别突然。我根本还没感受到那过年的气氛。我记得过去的几年，因为想赶快脱离学校那一堆堆的功课和趁新年好好休息玩玩（打麻将，玩牌，吃肉干），所以才特别期待新年的到来。可是，我想，今年之所以会觉得新年来的非常‘没什么’应该是因为我早已沉醉在假期的气氛里；每天都在玩，都在享受，哪里会在意有没有个新年给我机会休息呢？

what the heck did i just do. its so unbelievable i actually wanted to pen down my thoughts in chinese. and obviously, i gave up after finishing only one paragraph. anyway the above paragraph basically means that i found cny this year to come very suddenly and sorta 'unsignificantly'. yup

honestly ever since watching the new hzgg i've developed a greater liking for the chinese culture and the language. but not up to the extent where i would want to study chinese literature/study in chinese/do chinese anymore. (so phew i no longer need to touch chinese!) its just that the poems and everything from the eras back are so fascinating! ... (ok i can feel the general feel of disgust and disbelief from you readers)

so anyway i had my reunion dinner with my mother's side yesterday evening (instead of today). even though i didn't do much but eat and play cards but i still enjoyed all of us being there. actually cny has always been a bigger and much more enjoyable event for me than christmas or any other festivals. i love the goodies, the family gatherings, the typical 'gong xi gong xi', the 'low-ing' of the yu sheng (where everybody crapped out 4 word chinese phrases or like zhong toto ah! 4D ah! huat ah! dong nan xi bei ah!), the redness of everything and the atmosphere.

i believe i'd enjoy this year's cny even more because i'm just so.. free. no school, no work no nothing. plus cny means going out even more with friends and mahjong with zy and zoey! hahaha this post is kind of dry..

anyway here to all readers: happy chinese new year! ;) wish you all great health (for it is the most important) this dragon year!

to students like me: all the best in your new schooling environment (95' babies) or just, may you have the spirit of a dragonand excel in your studies!

to people who are already working (i doubt any adults read this blog): suck it up man its other year for you.

to parents: even though you might not need my reminder but just work hard at making babies.

ok this post is damn stupid. but ah everybody HUAT AH!

2011 holiday happenings

2012-01-20T12:02:00.006+08:00

right so i realised i hardly ever post about any gatherings i've been to this holiday. which is a waste, because this is really the last break i'll get before the A levels, or more seriously (according to someone who told me but sry i forgot who), this is the last break of your life because after jc/poly you'll move on to uni, work, getting married (aka slogging for your husband), giving birth. so yeah here it is. they are not in chronological order or sorted in any way.

bowling@kallang

where is the other group's photo?! anyway 8 of us. met them while they were in subway (they ice skated first) so ya. score was not bad considering this is the (less than third) time i'm playing bowling (the other times were on wii and the phone) so yeah. except for the first three bowls where i scored only 1. hahaha anyway our group won!! don't ask me why i'm standing so far away from the other three. haha anyway after that we went to the rooftop and played monopoly deal

sleepover@kirsten

basically we just slacked and became useless pieces of trash laying all around her bedroom floor. we played a lot actually. things like taboo and.. ya. we watched youtube videos (eg. sosingaporean, aaron gangsta oh 'priest', dee kosh), tried to karaoke through youtube (-.-). after dinner and all, we played monopoly deal, and played monopoly deal. we have no life. oh yes we finished ANTM 16. why is britany the winner!!

the next morning, we head over to KAP's macs and you guessed it, played monopoly deal again. afterwards i went home while the rest headed over to town to shop.

just a pretty interesting picture taken during the sleepover by ethan, kirsten's bro. come to think of it, we are pretty fated! (see deborah's bday celebration for more details) all the way since the sleepover! plus the only explanation why he can snap the picture while i snapped mine (in the small cam) is just... we have freaking sparking chemistry! woots woots. btw, the small camera is only a necklace sorta thing. its not a real camera.

trekking+lunch+shopping@macritchie+ion

kim chan and inez were probably the ones who suggested this. i mean, who the heck walks macritchie when you can be at home sleeping right! (see chengmun slept through 20 (is it?) alarm clocks!) well even though it appeared to be very tiring, but actually, it isn't, because of friends ^^ so actually it was overall a rather good idea because 1. you get to exercise and keep fit and 2. friends ^^ this picture should include seah ^^ i don't look too flattering in this one, but this is the only close enough full picture i could get off facebook so :/

so after the walk we went to ion for lunch (basically we ate all the burnt calories back) and then shopped for awhile. lah da da and walked over to lido! thumbs up for same expression (Y) other than that, the reason why i posted a picture of ruoning and i is just... she is rare.
sam'smeetup@wcp

why is this the only picture i can find on facebook of that day?! ahh well sam came back from the uk so we met up at wcp! btw, the pyramid there is rebuilt and now there are 2 slides of which you can slide down from! save you all the energy and fear from climbing down! and then after pei left, we (cheng inez sam me) walked around while sam roller bladed. went to clementi's mall for lunch at burger king and to queensway to buy sam's badminton racket. speaking of sam, she's the first person i've ever known to own a credit card (in the first place you don't see a lot of 16 year olds walking around with one right) and to not actually remember the pin. so while buying the racket, she was figuring out the pin number and the shop keeper's face was like .... :/ but yeah, that's sam! in between we also went to ikea.
postprom@sentosa

i'm pretty sure i've posted about this prom thing before but i'll post this picture here just because its very beautiful ^^

lepaking@kim

this day... was rather uneventful but eventful. the whole morning was spent with monopoly deal during which kim clocked a record of having 96million worth of bank money. then we hung around with the dogs (rather, seah and zing and zhimun) and just sat around... then we went to this nearby small mall called yourvillage where we took the above jumpshot ^^ pei was there in the morning. hahaha she left before i arrived.

fishing@gwen

kirsten is right. this is a nice picture ^^ so one day we went back to visit the choir. schoir is really small now. but yeah felt really old at that place. :/ then we went for lunch at united square with steph! ate the... texas chicken for the very first time. not really worth it in my opinion. oh ya! how come the polaroid we took in front of the xmas tree is not up on facebook?! then we headed to gwen's place and to ecp to fish in the canal. in between we played monopoly deal (again) and yeah. a very different gathering, i guess. :)

choir@uss

so we went to uss. i believed i've blogged about this. it was fun, but the ticket could have been cheaper. but yes this is taken during lunch (at chilli's), when kiran and steph met us ^^ there was a lot of fun and craziness going on, during which i even performed a magic trick! hahaha too bad video's not up there. anyway gonna miss these guys alot alot.

a really really nice group picture taken by marquisha's polaroid ^^

this is here for only just because the 2 roller coasters at the back formed a heart shape. :) plus we all looked so happy (and exhausted)

belatedbdaycelebrationfordeborah@island

group picture :) so we (chan gwen deb and i) were nearly an hour late because we were helping out at sc before that. anyway so deborah was really surprised hahha she even wanted to sing happy bday for somebody else. hahah true actually since this cake came almost 2 months late. so as you can see, we played monopoly deal (freaking again). oh and we chatted and played speed and cheat with poker cards. ohh by the way the cake (outside with gummies inside cookies and cream) is really nice!

this is probably the highlight product of the day. basically its a family tree linking all 6 of us together, with us marrying the other person's brother and all. hahaha its abit creepy come to think of it but it is nice having the thought of us all related next time ^^ care to join? ;)

scgs4syclassof2011gradceremony@scgs

class photo ^^ finally all of us graduated and honestly, the 2 years haven't been easy. just the word 'graduation' already holds so much within itself. i mean, we were all kind of separated initially but towards o's, we did bond a bit more and yes, congratulations to everyone because i believe our class did very well :D i don't wanna go into the "oh how nice it is it takes so much fate to come together and be in a same class of 38 out of 6 freaking billion people in the world" crap, even though its true. but well you know the last sentence of harry potter and the philosopher's stone, chapter 10 "hallowe'en" says:

"But from that moment on, Hermione Granger became their friend. There are some things you can't share without ending up liking each other, and knocking out a twelve-foot mountain troll is one of them."

well perhaps its not that matching to our situation, but its close. (plus i purposely took the book out so whatever objections you have you should shut up) we didn't knock down a troll, but we did go through what can be considered our first life ordeal together so yeah, friends :)

6L2007gathering@plazasing

i did talk about this before but yeah, here's a picture of it. :) ira and salihin should be in it as well. as to this gathering, i have nothing more to say, but i'm sure even though all the gatherings are like dying, i still believe 6L will stay strong. we will meet up again soon. 6L don't you ever think of running away oh and if you guys are wondering whether the last 2 guys are twins, they are.

Survey 1

2012-01-15T18:36:00.002+08:00

hello there! so i've been blog-hopping and came across these few surveys/quizzes done by lee rui and eliz on their blogs. so i decided to steal them and do it myself. actually its just for my own personal entertainment. i'm sure its nothing interesting so you can skip through these posts because that's what i did after reading a few of their answers.

5 Senses Bolding Survey!

I like to touch

1. crisp dollar bills
2. hot sheets fresh out of the dryer
3. worn down sandpaper
4. exfoliating face wash
5. books with leather bound covers
6. crayola model magic
7. smooth and cool ceramic items
8. hot heating pads
9. fringes on scarves
10. my eyelashes

I don't like touching

1. rusty chains; like on old swings
2. doorknobs, especially the ones to the restrooms
3. oily hair
4. oil pastels
5. sticky lab countertops
6. pimple juice
7. polar fleece
8. stretchy book covers
9. other people's keyboards
10. styrofoam

I like looking at

1. art by kidchan on deviantart
2. frying eggs
3. lego star wars stop animations
4. fashion magazines
5. art books
6. old photographs
7. the stars on cold, crisp nights
8. the second hand of a clock as it makes it's way around the face (for only awhile)
9. funny cat macros aka lolcats
10. kim bum. (is this a kpop star lol)

I don't like looking at

1. human muffin tops
2. things that are excreted from my body
3. bad fan art
4. letters while getting my vision tested
5. my teachers when they ask a question
6. things that are made out of cheap plastic
7. books that are out of order
8. tangled headphones
9. optical illusions
10. hugh jackman

I like smelling

1. soy sauce
2. wet pavement (wet pavement still smells like pavement)
3. ironed and starched clothes
4. new notebook paper
5. old books
6. the coffee before I can see it
7. freshly cut grass
8. tropical humid air
9. princess by vera wang
10. the ocean on a person

I don't like smelling

1. preservatives, especially formaldehyde
2. unwashed hair
3. fragrant flowers
4. sand in playgrounds
5. cleaning products
6. woody tones, like cedar
7. pure seduction, from victoria's secret (i generally don't like perfumes)
8. fish markets
9. rosemary
10. musk-y perfumes

I like tasting

1. creme brule
2. sour candies
3. creamy salad dressing
4. ginger-chicken broth
5. in-n-out hamburgers
6. salt
7. chicken-salad sandwiches
8. fried squid with marinara sauce
9. frozen yogurt
10. konpeito (japanese candy which is basically just a ball of sugar)

I don't like tasting

1. tofu
2. leeks
3. defeat
4. almonds
5. watered down soup
6. wheat bread
7. post nasal drip
8. chalky medicines
9. bitter coffee
10. strong breath mints

I like hearing/listening to

1. rain on my window
2. powerpop
3. foreign people talk
4. ignorant people arguing about silly things
5. acoustic versions of songs
6. jim dale reading harry potter (who is jim dale)
7. mexican mariachi music radio stations
8. ben folds
9. old camera shutters closing
10. drumline

I don't like hearing/listening to

1. screamo
2. country
3. what my parents have to say
4. the house creaking
5. garbage trucks
6. airplane toilets flushing
7. my nails getting clipped (this is noise of barely a second how am i supposed to listen to it?)
8. candy wrappers unwrapping in what would have been a silent room
9. people who can't sing attempting to do a cover of a song that I like
10. the voice of the person who does our daily announcements

oh and peiyi taught me on friday how to upload videos on blogger so much easily than i thought. i always believed we have to download the video, save it on your computer and then upload by clicking the relevant button on this blog post page. and then you browse through your files and wait a lifetime for the video to be uploaded. and what peiyi taught me was: use the video's m code.

(well ok this is supposed to be a picture for the classic "HOLY SHI-!!" pose by the tumblr dude but i can't find it so just imagine)

7 or 17: starting school blues still exists

2012-01-12T16:39:00.002+08:00

yup. honestly speaking, i'm starting to get afraid of starting school again. meeting new people, playing new games, will that be awkward?

even though i really don't wanna join choir again, i think i'll end up in choir again, somehow.

i haven't been exercising for so long. i don't wanna go for my first pe lesson and totally portray myself as this lousy, unfit, fat girl. napfa is going to be so much worse

enjoying almost 2 months of slacking and playing now, i don't exactly know how to study anymore. the restarting of the engines must take so much effort!

i'm so tired. everyday when afternoon has barely gone by, i'm already starting to feel sleepy. how to survive like that?

ahh well

"wa, heng ah!"

2012-01-10T17:41:00.004+08:00

was what i felt when i first saw my results slip. i was first attracted to the straight row of "A"s and i literally "phew!" and then i looked at the column whether that indicates either "ONE" or "TWO" and i was so damn freaking happy to see a "ONE" for history. oleh!!

so yup, all in all, i got an L1R5 of 7, and with higher chinese (surprisingly this was a freaking A2) and the cca points, i've got a final score of 3. which for me, is really a lot more (or less) than what i expected. i estimated that i would get a score more than that, so i'm really thankful for what i got. as a response to ziying's blog post about me not being too satisfied about my non-perfect scores: no worries, i'm very relieved and happy. not a single sense of regret. as to my mother, i wonder whether she is really proud of me because her first reaction when i told her i got a 7 was, "7? good or not?" anyway ziying, here i reply you, yup i read your blog post and thanks for caring and thinking about me ^^ heehee

so yup, i could have done better for amath and english, but everything's over and its time to move on. there were many people who started thanking their Gods all over facebook or quoting bible quotes, so here, i want to thank whoever's up there watching over me (i'm not a christian) or perhaps this personal guardian angel who might be just beside me now for 'blessing' my results. and if there's nobody there, then i guess, i'll give myself a pat on the back for the studying before o levels. honestly, i don't think i gave my all for all the subjects (coughsbiocoughs) so to get what i got, i'm happy.

there were friends who were unhappy over their results. yesterday when i tried to comfort them, i really didn't know what to say. i was so damn helpless and with so many people celebrating nearby, i felt so awkward. but here, after thinking about it, to those who are still depressed over their results: crying (or eating chocolate or ice cream or running) helps, but there comes a time when you need to get over it and move on because 10 years on, we'll look back and wonder how come a piece of paper can make us cry like that. it doesn't define a single percent of our character.

i don't really want to say anything more because i will sound very hypocritical, but all in all, all of you have done and tried your best in the exams, so there's really nothing to continue being sad for. if you have not done your best, then take comfort in the fact that you still have 2/3 more years to prove your worth and this is regardless of what jc/poly you go to.

ok i'm done with this. don't wanna hang around and i need to shit.

oh did i say. yesterday after results i ended up with shujun again at bpp, just eating and browsing CD shops - things we do always, whenever we're together in a mall. i meant, i just want to say that its amazing how after 4 years everything's still the same and all. ^^

lastly, congrats to those who did well! (this means those who are happy with their results)

the '6L' 'gathering'

2012-01-08T20:06:00.003+08:00

o level results is out tomorrow at 2pm. somehow i haven't been panicking these few days. i think its gonna be like receiving chinese results all over again. i panicked and became so paranoid a while before the release, but the last week and even on that day itself, i was calm beyond calm. i mean, calm beyond my expectations.

i still do think about what i'll get and try to estimate what i'll get based on my performance 2 months ago. but that is all. i don't freak out or whatever. but i do get really really thankful for the a1 i got for normal chinese. it really helped a lot. (sorry to the normal chinese guys)

anyway hopefully tomorrow at this time, when i think about my results, i would jump for joy and become almost delirious with glee as well as disbelief. but up till then, i guess i would just continue blogging, surfing the net, checking facebook, reading novels etc etc.

anyway good luck for all receiving results tomorrow! hang in there!

omg do you guys know that the scooby doo song is sang by simple plan?! (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nhT2DwqVpN8&feature=related )

anyway change topic!

reason for the first apostrophe in my title: even though it was posted on the 6L'07 page on facebook, meant for all the 6L'07 pupils to attend the 6L'07 gathering, in total, only 8/38 turned up. first and foremost, i wanna clarify that i'm not complaining, because the 'gathering' (for this second apostrophe i will explain later) was actually rather fun. fun in its own ways i mean. so firstly i met up with salihin to catch mission impossible III. it was really really good, its funny and action-y at the same time. and then along the way to marina bay to meet kahwei and daryl, we chatted a lot ^^ and caught up with each other. went to marina bay to find out that we only went there to gather (while kw and daryl just went there for toastbox lol) because we ended up going backwards to plaza sing. oh and we met ira in the station too! back there, we decided to catch another movie: sherlock holmes. which was better than the first sherlock holmes for me. it has more feelings and whatever. not just all detective work. and then while ira and salihin left, the rest of us met up with the twins and hwaimun. and we went for dinner. during which i left a proper restuarant without ordering anything for the first time. haha we ended up having dinner at thai's kitchen blah blah. and then watched another movie: some dragon show which title i'm too lazy to check. its in chinese and i think its rather fine ^^ so yesterday was the first time in my 16 years of existence where i watched 3 movies in a day. kind of like a movie marathon. hahah and out of the 3 tickets, i only paid for 1. (hahahha salihin insisted on treating --> what a gentleman right haha while i ran out of money by the 3rd movie and hwaimun paid for mine first) so that's practically it. after everything went home on 190 with hwaimun and yeah.

reason for second apostrophe in my title: how did a primary school class gathering ended up with 1/4 of the time travelling, 1/2 the time getting leg and eye cramps in the theatres, and the other 1/4 eating and spending time in daiso/anime/figurine shops/arcade is beyond me. isn't a class gathering supposed to be one where everybody actually gathers around and chat and play comfortably? whose class gathering ends up in daiso? lol

its 11.20pm at night now i think i've started this blog post more than 3 hours ago. i really don't feel anything for tomorrow. i'm still treating tonight like those normal nights where i will wake up the next day only to start my usual routine again: get and stay on the computer.

hmmm

ayye, welcome 2012!

2012-01-01T00:46:00.002+08:00

2012 new year resolutions

be a filial, happy daughter. tolerate more, show more patience, understand my mum more and love her more. do not procrastinate when buying her presents/showing her love.

be a sister that my brother will be proud having. do not get frustrated/irritated with him that easily. talk to him more frequently, especially now since i have more time in january.

be a good friend, reliable friend to those good buddies i have. have more sensitivity before i speak, think about others.

meet new friends, be more open and not afraid to be myself.

good O level results. (8 and below pleaseeeeeeee)

be fit consistently. work out/exercise regularly. really, 3 times a week excluding pe?

stay healthy, eat healthy, stay happy, be happy.

all my resolutions sound so cliche! ahh, but here, i wish all of you guys an awesome and meaningful 2012! remember health is really the most important so guys take care of yourselves, stay safe, and stay healthy. even if not for yourself, do it for your loved ones.

the year of 2011

2011-12-31T12:44:00.003+08:00

i wish i can link 2011 to a year of making miracles, achieving beyond my limits, studying to my fullest, enjoyed myself to the best etc etc. but no.

there were many instances in 2011 where i was disappointed in myself. for example, when i procrastinated and ended up not giving any presents to my mother during mother's day and her birthday as well as to my brother on his birthday or when he came out of army. i hated myself for being so cold hearted and not showing enough concern for both of them. in school, i hated myself for hesitating to help, thinking of perhaps myself more than others at times, or thinking of my pride. i was disappointed when i can't seem to be the friend who stood by the other in times of need. in academics, i was disheartened by my outstanding lack of motivation during tests, and even during the exams period.

after everything and everything, 2011 is finally ending. honestly i don't feel as if there's a huge load lifted from me, perhaps because i've never felt how heavy 2011 was. the year just passed in a flash, in periods of stress, freaking out, catching breaths and then going back to the heavy routine of homework and studying and grades again. of course, in the meantime, there is also choir.

which brings me to the first thing i'll say i'm proud of. breaking history and obtaining the very first gold with honours in 16 years is definitely not a feat people will forget over time. even though we say, oh the judges this year were specially lenient, but at least we take pride in the fact that we're on the same level as other good schools. i take more pride in being the senior, the oldest, to lead the choir to the GWH prize. as compared to my fellow level mates who are the chairmen, section leaders etc of the choir, my contribution is so much less. but still. i'm so darn happy whenever i think that the 2011 batch was the first batch to ever obtain a GWH. friends in choir is definitely a joy to think about too. i thank whoever's watching us that despite being a huge level of 22 (we made up half the choir), we are still rather bonded as compared to other levels. even though there is a clear distinction of 2 groups, but i guess, one would always be closer to another friend than to some other. so i've grown to love my level, with all the imperfections, how we find it so hard to often come to a damn decision, how even with conflicts we just keep it down and how we somehow manage to still crap out a performance with barely perfect rehearsals (even though the performances were still really crap). we could literally feel the tension and the weariness of everything during those countless recess practices but eventually we got through everything. so after being through so much together in 4 years, i'm so thankful we're still together and hopefully, will continue to go strong ^^

YOU KNOW WHAT. i'm bored already. i don't wanna do reflections anymore. anyway to the sy dudes, i've written all of you guys letters! so its ok right ^^ and i wouldn't want to repeat myself again so.. :/

ok see you guys next year. what a disappointment right this post.

the... future?

2011-12-28T16:26:00.004+08:00

as far as right now goes, i can only see myself going into JC and completing the A's. i can't see anything after that. its not even a blur. its nothingness. its like i'm not even going to exist after 18 years old. (but omg don't let me die) like the protagonist in those sci fi dramas who can look in the future but suddenly can't seem to discern anything out after this specific date. it just stops, you know. and then the omnious, alarmed feeling strikes and the dramatic, foreshadowing music descends.

of course, i was thinking about my future in silence, but the feelings i got were as strong as as if there were loud music playing behind. the nearest future for me, is definitely, the O level results. not going to deny, but ever since the meeting with gigi and we were talking about the results, i've been feeling very jittery. (is that even an emotion) i've always wanted to be you know, 潇洒 about the whole results thing, acting like this isn't one of the most important things that matter to me. but who's to kid, this damn results thing is really taking over me these days. there were times where i was so freaked out that i literally grabbed a chunk of hair and pulled. how!?! it seems like my brain has been programmed to accept anything only below 9 points. which is almost impossible and unachievable because when i think of it, the 6 subjects that will get me less than 9 points are not even there.

no one can be certain about english, and i'm pretty sure i'm not very outstanding in english in school. physics is uncertain too, because i've already made some damn ridiculous mistakes. chemistry was manageable but still uncertain. biology is not even a subject that i'll consider being in my l1r5 (come on numerous class tests of 15/35 how far do you think bio can get me) emath is the one that i've most confidence in, but come on, whose 'most confident comfirm plus chop plus black and white' is not emath? amath is screwed beyond screwed it just saddens me to hell when i think about both papers. ss was fine but really, nobody, even the best student in humanities cannot be sure about humanities. (no offence nat ho) the lit unseen passage deserves to be punched, crushed, tore, shredded into a million freaking pathetic pieces because it just messes with your brain. oh you can punch the author (who happens to be not crazy in her words but because of the passage you suspect she is crazy and is just using reverse psychology to f your mind), cause you can't punch paper. and history, the one that i'm most disappointed in, reading the question so darn carefully already but still not giving what it wants. what's more the modern world paper is so shit too (?!)

so yeah, i would be really at a loss of what to do if i get like 10 points etc etc because that'll just be damn... unacceptable.

ok whatever for now i'm over this i'm over this i'm moving on to the next part.

i'm actually really excited to grow up. i want to grow to at least 20 and stay in my 20s forever. well firstly, i want to go to JC and meet new friends, interact with guys (a specie (omg lol what is the singular of species or is there no singular) that is rather unfamiliar to me now after 4 years of girls' school), get a new cca. and then while going through my studies, i'll drink for the first time, go clubbing for the first time, perhaps experience my first kiss . then at 21, during uni, i'll become a proper adult and proper woman! by then, i would have gotten my driving licence and whatnot. and after that, i'll go out to work, hopefully as someone that i would enjoy being, and meet new people, go into the working world. soon, i'll meet a guy (or not), get married (stay alone but happy?), get kids (no way will i get pets) and live on happily ever after.

or, my life can go the complete opposite. perhaps a few days from now, i'll be walking down orchard road and then get searched and spotted to become a model for a company. soon, i'll realise my hidden-but-dying-to-explode passion for modelling and for acting and i'll go into entertainment. perhaps i'll land the role of the next Hermione or Bella (omg i typed Balla at first) or the next 小燕子. not long later, perhaps at 20, you'll see me on magazines and television interviews and signing autographs. by 22, i would have earned my first million from my Jack Bond trilogy. and because i'm so freaking rich and influential, guys would shun away from me and i'll stay single forever. (just like how most of the stars do)

or, i'll become the female lead in those typical dramas. i'll be walking down orchard road, then trip over this man's $999 branded leather shoes. and then i'll fall over, but before that, i'll make a damn epic 'falling down' unglam face at some camera that will just happen to be there. and before i fall flat on my face, i'll feel this pair of strong arms grabbing (or circling) my waist and i'll look up to find this man with sunglasses looking down at me. time would stop or go in slow motion, and i'll be bewitched by his attractive and handsome look but also notice this cold inpenetrable look on his face. and then i'll be introduced as this poor but so damn filial girl, dressed in rags and so 'different' from the other typical fangirls....

ok that was too much. but you see! i'm so damn excited for the future. i want to know who are the friends that'll still be with me 10 years later, or who i'll invite to my wedding. i want to know what kind of job i'll get, what kind of life i'll lead, what kind of r'ship i'll share with my mum and bro, what kind of r'ship i'll share with my cousins and relatives. i want to know, whether i'll be in singapore or alabama or argentina. i want to know whether i'll be happy or not. so yes ^^

and i swear, if the damned 2012's going to happen, i'll punch it in its face first for ruining my future. so much for being so excited now huh

the picture says it all.

2011-12-25T23:43:00.002+08:00

and happy birthday Sir Issac Newton :)

2011's christmas wasn't anything big for me. i woke up at 12 in the afternoon and basically just lie on the bed and move around for 12 hours. till now. so before i missed the chance (because you know, 2011's christmas only comes once), i took the computer from my brother, and here i am, wishing you guys a merry christmas!! woots woots!

the new year is a bigger affair for me so you see, xmas is not as hyped up as on my blog as on everybody else's facebook/twitter.

so well, there is this website, 9gag.com that i was introduced to long time ago. its kind of like tumblr, only the posts there are all funny/owned-worthy. so if you guys happen to be lamenting over a lonely christmas, this website shall be my present to you!

christmas is coming!

2011-12-21T11:46:00.002+08:00

and the holidays is ending :/

this holiday has been good. well even though i didn't go through some life changing, 'OMG' moments but without homework, without assignments, without extra lessons, without cca, without stress, this holiday has been good. ^^ haha i speak very dramatically right. anyway i think i was too ambitious/overestimated myself before the holidays. during the O's, i was carefully planning and telling myself that during this holiday, i would learn the guitar, learn how to draw and pick up sign language again (basically anything for self-enrichment so that i'll look like a better person yup). hahah i really underestimated my laziness and overlook the fact that i wouldn't even have a slight drive to perform all these tasks after freedom has been bestowed on me since November the 15th.

so after more than a month of holidays, the only things that i can annouce and be proud of are:

1. i learnt how to play "I'm Yours" on the guitar
2. i earned $150
3. i sat on all the wild roller coasters at USS
4. i made new friends (sorta) by going to mow's church 'amazing race'

in regards to christmas plans and presents, its still a nothing now. i'm going for a stayover at inez's place tomorrow with the other sy guys and we were supposed to buy presents to exchange and now, one day before, i don't have anything yet. lol which is why i'll be going shopping later.

on sunday i went for my cousin's ROM dim sum celebration. basically its to celebrate him getting registered at ROM next year january. so he treated us (not only the cousins, but the adults as well) to dim sum! i really enjoyed it cause even though there were times of silence at the table, i love my cousins' presence. hahaha and being the youngest, i often get served (despite being 16) so that's a plus point as well! anyway wish them all the best!

after dim sum i went to my aunt's place (my dad's side) and we were talking about which jc i'll go to in 2012. honestly, i didn't know what to reply but basically we were just discussing about the locations of the colleges and how convenient they are for me. and i realised most of the colleges are freaking out of the way so now i'm just wishing for good grades so that i can decide where i want to go and not be restricted by my marks that i can only choose a jc somewhere over the other side of the island.

ok i'm done. currently listening to perfect by simple plan. its really good!

family gatherings: to go or not to go

2011-12-17T21:27:00.002+08:00

the title sounds strangely insulting to all my relatives, but no, insults and complaints are not what i have in mind towards them.

on the contrary, i really appreciate and cherish them. well its not that noble, i mean, everybody likes their families and relatives and whatever blood related people right. and well, its not like im best buddies and never-ever-can-leave-each-other close kint relatives with them, i'm pretty sure my r'ship with them is like anybody else's -- close enough for relatives, but still with bits of awkwardness and unfamilarity.

being the youngest 'kid' on my mother's side (that i spend more time with as compared to my dad's), i realised, as i grow up, less and less cousins appear for family gatherings. of course, most of them are in their 20s now with jobs and all that they just appear less for visiting ahma every weekend, or even when celebrating christmas and new year and whatever, they leave early for friends and other celebrations. my god, i hate myself for being so stick in the mud and so affected by this shit. i mean, cousins growing away from each other over time is a natural phenomenom right? look at all the parents now. do they hang out with their cousins? no!

so why is this generating such a huge thing on me. today i went for my aunt's housewarming and besides me, only one other cousin turned up (out of 8, excluding my aunt's daughters) and he left halfway too. so i was left there, alone for about 3 hours, while other adults communicate with each other in dialects that they drowned the voice of the tv and blah. so everyone was walking around, i was sitting alone in some corner for 3 hours.

omg i hate this i sound so whiny and immature but i really don't know why. i'm not complaining about the housewarming (i swear with my head) but sometimes i'm just sick of being the only ones there and having no people to communicate too. all of them have their own friends/siblings while my bro probably don't even bother to go as well.

then soon i started to feel so lonely that i teared up. then, i hated myself for being weak. wtheck right who likes to be a crybaby. my god, but at that moment, i felt so 委屈 and almost bullied. just like last december, when i was left alone on my own with other adults in a chalet for 2011's countdown. adults fine, but at least some teenagers or whatever right? i remember, back in 2010, i felt almost betrayed, why is it that people spend their new year's eve with their friends and not their relatives?

perhaps soon i'll become like that. forgoing family gatherings for friends and clubbing and partying or whatever. at this point, i'm almost at the verge of just heck caring family gatherings and just say 'no' to my mother whenever she tells me about one. when i came home today, i was immaturely the verge of actually throwing a temper at my mum for just bringing me there, abandoning me there, talking to her siblings and blatantly ignoring my feelings. (obviously she's not like that)

so today after reutnring home i actually set my mind on just not going for those family things anymore. but right away, immediately, i hesitated. the reason being i didn't want to be portrayed as an unfilial, 'grow up got wings to fly liao' typical teenager in front of my adult relatives and other cousins. the other reason also being i really, genuinely want to visit both my grandmas. just them, not my aunts or uncles but my grandmas. whenever with them, i feel a cloud of adoration and sweetness protecting me. i feel love from the old ladies - the 'bosses' of the households.

and that explains for the title of this conflicting, contradicting, to me, disturbed post. until right now, after typing out everything i feel, i still can't figure out what exactly i want. in my brain, i'm still blaming my mum for insisting that i go for family gatherings, i'm still blaming all my cousins for not coming, but mostly, i'm also blaming myself for being so stubborn and inflexible about this whole issue. growing up, finding good friends, spending nice times with them, its natural isn't it? so why can't i just shut up and stop complaining. why do i have to make it sound like a huge thing?

i just hate myself in this post. this thing sucks omg i need to grow up. i should grow up.

and to all fellow relatives reading this (i don't think so though), i do not have any hatred towards you guys (i swear on my 4 limbs), i just hate the situation. and i really really look forward to the next gathering where i'll see all of my cousins celebrating together. even when we don't talk, their presence is enough to make me feel satisfied and grateful for having a family.

to all my friends: ha look at what a loser your friend is. but no worries! (please do not think i'm wallowing in self pity cause i hate that; i'm just trying to figure out my thoughts)

新还珠格格

2011-12-13T20:39:00.003+08:00

so i've finally finished watching 新还珠格格. there have been many criticisms and whatnot towards this remake by many fans of the older, classic version. but because i barely have any recollections of the old one (just vague flashes of er kang behaving like a mad man from hzgg 3, which actually itself also received many negative reactions from the audience), i actually rather enjoyed this remake. with a 70% change/add-ons to the script, its definitely more entertaining, and because of the so much more advanced and specific filming equipment now as compared to those in 1997, this remake is definitely more 顺眼 (basically its a lot less pixalated and all that).

also, i love the plot itself. (this is kudos to the author qiong yao) its really a drama that can make you laugh and cry in the same episode. with the strong theme of love and just, enjoying life as it is (活的多姿多彩), its really attractive and draws you in after the first 5 episodes or so. i don't even know why i'm typing a review of this show lol probably just too excited after watching all 98 episodes of this. oh and i love the chemistry and support between the actors playing er kang and zi wei. they are very compaitable as well. and oh, the emperor and er kang and benjamin (yeah they added a foreigner in haha) are all handsome people ^^ but the ending was quite disappointing though, there wasn't a proper reunion for 小燕子 and 紫薇, who are basically the main characters of the whole story.

anyway you see chinese appearing here and there in this post; consider it as just a tribute to the show. you guys should cherish it too cause i doubt proper chinese characters will appear anytime soon here.

oh and Sean Kingston's "Beautiful Girls" music video is so... unmatching to its lyrics. lol the lyrics tell a story but yet the video is just about retro-ly dressed women dancing in an 80s bar with sean kingston. anyway i really love the song and his voice. its not all powerful and legendary and whatnot, but its special and gives off a funny vibe. by funny i meant, funny.

and i realised, other than linkin park, simple plan is actually a very very good band. i know i'm damn slow but ya. untitled is a freaking good song.

the flashes of the mind and the randoms

2011-12-04T22:01:00.004+08:00

there comes a time when your mind inevitably shifts to focus on a matter that you don't want think about, or a matter that you just want to avoid, be it temporarily or permenantly.

for me, it was today. onthe o level results. yeah laugh laugh, i mean, if i were somebody else, i would also criticise myself for being so paranoid and all heads over heels over studying and grades.

it came in occasional vague flashes in my mind, while i was enjoying using the computer, playing the guitar, reading a book, bathing or just walking. the concept of 'what if'. what if i didn't do well enough to get 6 points. what if i didn't only get 7, but 8 points. or what if i get some grades higher than that. would i be able to take it? would i be able to take doing one of the worst in my class/school or just performing way below my teachers' expectations?

and when that happens, the mind automatically flashes again and gives me recollections on how i performed in the exam. or, how i thought i performed. to be honest, i thought most of the papers were fine, except for amath and history that i just somehow extraordinarily screwed. and then, as if the brain is not paranoid enough, it then moves to threaten me 'what if your definition of 'fine' is not enough to get you an A1? what if the whole world does well?' and that, automatically again, moves to the scary thought of performing less than what you expected - 8 points, 9 points etc. and then, the cycle repeats.

so i've successfully convinced myself that i'm not going to perform well. i'm prepared for whatever i'm going to get on that day. there is nothing to pity me about, because i'm not feeling sad or angry or regretful. this is just preparation on my part. miss teng once said, if you don't do well in the exams, you'll just be 'living on borrowed time' during the holidays. that is definitely true, but now, since i'm resigned to whatever that's going to come my way next january, i'm going to enjoy myself (not that i haven't been actually) and anyway after all, i did try my best, and i did work to get what i want. whether living on borrowed time now or not, it doesn't matter.

and that's why i'm going to uss tomorrow with the choir kids. WHOOO! mega change of mood i know but omg 66 bucks!!! it better not rain if not i'll just demand a refund lol. i can't wait to sit on the roller coasters. ever since prom and the (wtheck is the name of the apartment i overnight in i still can't get it right. its either ah-ma-ra or sa-ma-ra or what) stay, looking at the roller coasters, there is this rush in me that can't wait to sit on those damn things and wash myself off with the wind. what the heck was that all about. ok ya

ohh and i discovered i did have chicken pox before! thank goodness! all along i was so afraid i would get it when i'm an adult (they say it will be worse). well, not really too actually cause my mum always tell me that i got chicken pox when i was in her womb. heck yeah i actually believed half of it. but today, my mum showed me the medical certificate that was given to me when i was 3 for chicken pox. yay free!

ok i've really been slacking and lazy-ing ever since prom ended. i really want to find a job but grr its so hard. zy and zoey are cashiers now and i did consider applying to become one, but many of them want part time workers for at least 4-5 months. so :/

anyway ok see you guys around!

the days before becoming a sloth 2: prom pictures!

2011-11-22T11:02:00.016+08:00

4sy classmates :0 all so pretty right.

gwen, kiran, me, pei

best friend winnie and me!

4 year friend: ziying :))

me taking soup ^^

shuqing and me :)

shujun and me :) one of our first photos together!

me, inez, cla lim who won miss elegant! :)

me and gwenny!!

me and deborah :)) thanks for studying togteher and history-ing all the time ^^

chan and i :) thank god we got through the fast parts in time!

me and anu - ex table partner!

gosh, me and amierah :D all the loving memories with her i will take with me :)

and of course, bpp ^^ inception and all the going home together ;')

this is the jacuzzi behind our suite. we didn't use it but did sit inside and talk for awhile :)

a look at our suite 1

a look at our suite 2

room mates (plus inez who's taking the picture) rm number: 763 :)

mmm

zhi mun, chengmun and i on the bed ^^ gosh the bed was so big but still not enough for 7 pple. (pei slept on a small mattress on the floor)

at sentosa beach ;) it was so windy our hair was everywhere.

i shall end off with this. its abit of "waddaya lookin at".

the days before becoming a sloth: Prom Night 2011

2011-11-22T10:24:00.004+08:00

right so there were so many things happening in the last few days that i couldn't even get on the computer for more than hour. i wouldn't mind staying at home straight after o's and watching my dramas actually; i would have probably finish 98 episodes of huan zhu ge ge.

but anyway! prom was ok. dressing up was shit and prom itself was... it wasn't really really good but i wouldn't say it was bad either. it was kind of poorly organised and for my table the only fun part was probably the games. and the lucky draws, which sums up to the word: epic. so there were we, sitting and praying that every draw a teacher drew has our number on it, but the people going up were always from the other sy table behind us and the gr table in front of us. so by the time it came to the final draws, we were obviously agitated and panicky but definitely resigned to our unlucky fate. then kim chan told us to sit back and relax so we'll get it (reverse effect you know) and heck we did!! ooohhh btw kim chan's the prom queen ^^ she looked so much like jessica tan.

this is probably the only decent photo i could find. :/ left: inez, prom queen! (kim chan), cheng mun, zi ying, pei yi, seah yi ling, kwok yi ling, steph tan :)

ok this blog post is going to be so damn dry cause i'm just recounting everything that happened. its just facts that i want to take down and remember when i visit my blog a few years later. so if you're already bored then.. don't look.

post prom was probably the real adventure. so you see, we had to take a shuttle bus from one degree 15 to vivo, and then run to catch a bus that will take us to our hotel from vivo. and see 8 girls all dressed up, in heels, with tangs bags, running around a mall at night, is kind of an unusual scene. a snippet that might have been taken out from amazing race ;) and so, i filmed the whole process of the mad dash from our alighting stop to the boarding area. hurhur i don't think this video is going up on facebook anytime soon so don't wait for it. and so when we reached exit B, the place where cheng's bro told to board the bus, we realised that we were supposed to be at exit D, and not B. so ah we ran for nothing and we've obviously missed our bus. (haiz it'll be so cool if i had pictures/screenshots but i don't cause the vid is not with me :()

and so we went to the taxi stand and there were so many people and so few cabs coming in. plus it was 11 plus in the night. we were even 'picked up' by a few men who suggested taking their van and paying 35 bucks. heck that would be so damn dangerous. we could have been involved in a gang rape (the other way) so we called for cabs and waited and finally we got 2. so i hopped into the first one with some others and inez took a second cab. but the cab was called by her dad so we left another cab waiting there :/ so we called and cancelled the cab lor. embarrassing man!

ok this is getting really boring so i'll just speed through whatever happens next. anyway will wait for hotel room pictures to be uploaded so i can post them here. so we went back to the room, everybody bathed/talked on the bed/skyped sam/played monopoly deal/played truth or truth/slept at 4. and omg i snored so damn loudly hahaha i feel so bad and embarrassed at the same time. woke up, played more, eat more, then made our way to vivo where we basically played even more monopoly deal everywhere and got free floss buns from doing surveys for bread talk people. and after that, i met up with shujun and went home talking on the bus! (and sleeping)

yess done ok wait i got a few more pictures. ok i'm posting it in another post. k see ya.

2011-11-19T09:21:00.001+08:00

i'm sick of my hair. i wanna cut it again. probably layer it and get bangs back again like i had for 13 years of my life.

i know this is not an impulse.

i hate packing

2011-11-17T13:43:00.003+08:00

well i actually did type a blog post after the o's but i gave up after writing a few sentences cause i was just not in the mood to do it.

i had a lot to say before the exams ended, but just refrained myself from the computer because i didn't want going online and blogging to 'jinx' my results. and so what motivated this blog post? seeing all the friends reactivating their facebooks, creating new twitter/tumblr/formspring (speaking of which i might actually come up with a twitter acc!) i too was influenced by the spontaneous 'reactivation hype' again, and so, here comes the post :)

tonight's prom night and ever since last night my mum has been fussing here and there about what to bring and whether i have enough of this and what. i know she cares about her daughter's first well, 'ballroom' experience, but really, i don't see the need to get so hyped up over prom. painting nails and doing hair, seriously? well ok i don't have mega earth crushing objections over dolling up oneself for such an event, but i think my personality simply rejects everything that comes with such activity. please do not take any offence when you guys read this.

i must first clarify, i am highly excited for seeing everybody at prom and for the stayover at the hotel tonight with all the awesome people but i really hate packing. even going to libraries to study taking 10 minutes to get all the related materials into the bag and extracting unwanted ones sometimes really pisses me off. its such a chore omg. packing for later would probably have to be worse, because other than the dress, i need to put in all the whatever stuff i have to bring.

i also hate packing my room because i know its gonna be restored into its orginal junkhouse in a few days. actually, to put it simply, i am just lazy. the overwhelming extent of my laziness is just so damn unbelievable. i think i underestimated that extent. especially with the end of exams, i guess i'll turn into a complete slob soon.

but ok despite whatever i said, i still look forward to the overnight with the 4sy people! and skyping with sam even though i'm not that close to her anymore :(

as i type this blog post in between watching 还珠格格, i actually just want to stay at home and watch my show the whole damn day instead of going to sentosa. why the f (give me a while to properly type this word out because its still taboo to me) must our prom be at an island so far away!

ah whatever choir's performing tonight i hope everything goes well and we will not screw it up.

hope you guys are enjoying being a slob too. or for those that are hardworkingly reading ahead A level material or earning your first income, then, congratulations, you have not become a lazy arse like me.

the bloody freaking nerves...

2011-10-23T18:48:00.003+08:00

FREAK THIS FREAK FREAK FREAK PANICKING LIKE SHIT NOW

just 5 minutes ago i was panicking, but not for o's tomorrow, but for not panicking. but now after going on sonia's tumblr and cherlyn's twitter and all that shit that everybody's posting, i am panicking. *(^*&^%*&^*(&

i hope what i do is enough. i hope what i do is enough. i hope what i do is enough. A1 pleaseeee eng eng eng and the whole of o's but especially eng!! damn this thing why must eng be the freaking L1!!

im gonna prove to myself and others and whoever bothering listening to my rant. i need to do well. urgh you might not believe it but im doing this for ma. i wanna do well so at least she can be freaking happy at at least one thing about me. proud to have such a daughter. must do her proud must do her proud.

nooooooooo panic panic i should go and bathe right. urgh FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF. and must do well to earn many many money to buy my car and my house and to buy a whole africa state. ahhhh

shit i really think 6 points is impossible :(((((((((( freak this im going to bathe and calm down.

work hard, everybody!

2011-10-18T00:07:00.004+08:00

everybody kingsley on youtube is really damn funny. even though he's super vulgar. (disclaimer i only went on youtube after studying ok) anyway he's just a dude talking about overexposed stuff and its really true. credits to cherlyn for introducing him to me.

oh and a few days ago i googled (it has been officially proven that 'google' has became a verb btw) "how to focus" or "how to study" or so on and so forth, and lo and behold after all the moving around, finding suitable places, getting physically and grossly sick of macs, libraries and even parks, google says the best way to study is your freaking toilet. -.-

"Sit in a cramped room. When focusing, you want to concentrate on one thing, and only one thing. If you are in a cramped room, there is not much you can do. You will not be tempted to walk around in order to waste as much time as you can. Also, many people do not enjoy working in cramped spaces. If you are working in a cramped space, you will want to work as fast as you can in order to get out of the room. The best place to focus is in the bathroom"

The best place to focus is in the bathroom

The best place to focus is in the bathroom

The best place to focus is in the bathroom

excuse me while i move my table into the washroom. well soon i'll be stinking of BO because i would be sick of the bathroom and would not even want to bathe. gross. anyway regardless of whether it is true or not its just damn weird and nobody ever studies in the bathroom. unless you count bringing some notes in while shitting. but that usually don't get you anyway because you'll be too busy forcing the shit out or complaining about how slimy and watery the shit is or how to make the shit land softer, if you're in a public toilet. so yeah advice from the author of 'focusing your mental abilities in the bathroom' advises: usually studying on the toilet bowl doesn't help.

so anyway this will probably be the last post before the O's. i'm definitely lagging behind my timetable. its damn hard to follow one urgh. but i'll try. I MUST FINISH SS LAST THEME AND SEA UNIT 2 BY TOMORROW. today cherlyn and i were just talking about O's results (of course, what else) and we were freaking out. (note that i didn't put 'freaking ourselves out' because its a fact that we should freak out) i aimed and am still aiming for 9a1s but recently i've discovered that that's near impossible. there were only 7 students who scored that last year. and i thought it was so common. worse still, i find that getting L1R5 of 6 is a freaking challenge itself. we have 9 subjects, and higher chinese is practically out of the league unless you're a goddess. and amongst the 8, how can you guarantee that your math and amath would be a1s? would you blank out on that day? are you doing sufficient practice? how about chem, physics and bio? enough practice? have you completeted the tys? have you memorised all that is needed to be memorised? and after all that, if you can guarantee 5 A1s, i don't see how easy english can get for an A1. so must must must buck up. must get stressed everyday so that motivation will fall upon me to work hard.

and anyway today on the way home i was looking out of the window and i saw many foreign workers, esp in the little india area and the place of their hostels. all of them were dressed simply, normal, sometimes oversized shirt with a pair of black pants. some were carrying plastic bags, carrying food, bag slinged on one shoulder, either walking back or getting up the bus.

usually we find these foreign workers scary. as if they have an ulterior motive or as if going to harm you. or at least that was what i form of the stereotypes of the foreign workers in singapore. and its so darn sad because they didn't choose this life. they didn't choose the life where they had to worry and plan for the next meal, next day. was it due to the lack of education that made them unable to find a job in their home country? they didn't choose to come here, away from their cherished families just to be looked down upon or ignored by local singaporeans. not that i say hi to them anyway but after seeing their plight, i would like to thank and be grateful for

having a family, being accpted/seen as normal by the society, live comfortable lives, given the 'take for granted' opportunities for education and control our future. i thank for the money that i have securely in my pocket everyday and how i do not have to be under the blistering sun for the building of the new facilities.

even though a few minutes after this, i know i would go back to being unappreciative, complaining to my mother/whining why we have to study and become a hypocrite. so i would like to leave this post here as evidence that i was at least grateful once.

the days before the O's

2011-10-09T02:15:00.002+08:00

O's in my title sounds like some cereal, instead of the one i have in mind. hmm

sometimes when you want so bad for someone to notice you, you neglect the ones closest to you. the ones who care, and value you more than you think they do. so i guess, while persevering in your aim to become good friends that someone, become lifelong friends with those more worth the while. that being said, i feel like i hardly express my feelings for my friends. i can rarely remember a time when i've confessed my dependence or how important a person is to me to someone. i should start. but things can get rather awkward...

anyway 2 weeks to O's and i feel like i'm lagging behind :( everybody's mugging so quickly! i am motivated, but i really need to keep focus when i'm studying. ohh and i realised today how hard it is to get 9A1s. i mean, all along i've thought that 9A1s will be definite as long as you study. but today, i realised that there were only 7 students who scored 9A1s last year. not that i don't have confidence in myself (not that i have alot too), i guess now i would just lower my expectations and just aim for a fulfilling 2 weeks such that my progress would be exponential and just the maximum i can go.

friday was the last day of school. well the official one at least. its crazily surprising how time passed so quickly. sec 1 to now, does that mean i've taken the 960 bus for more than 2400 times? (assuming there are 300 school days a year..) anyway, i really can't register and comprehend how fast it is. how close we are to ending secondary school life. how close we are to becoming real, working adults. i might hate scgs sometimes, but definitely not the people inside. i might hate the school's system of tests and more tests, but definitely not the friends i've made from choir, class and random encounters.

but before i go too far, i shall stop here for whatever's left remaining is for after the O levels.

all the best, you guys! for the obvious reasons

the unsung heroes

2011-09-19T00:27:00.002+08:00

eh title not bad for a 4ooth post right!

anyway should i really be here? its 12:28am in the morning on monday i should be sleeping! but urgh i felt a really bad need to blog. not of any mega world-changing reasons but i've just gotten off facebook/blogs of the 6K people. please: i am NOT stalking them. i just happened to come across jonathan quek on fb and from there it just linked to everywhere. well seeing their closeness, i am glad for them, especially after reading amanda's blog on how she felt about her class.

thaaaat being said, its hard not to feel a little jealous >:( how come their class gathering so many people one! 6L's class gatherings are always so pathetic. which makes me wonder whether i, or the other organisers are trying too hard. hahaha i think we are. personally its not like i don't believe 6L doesn't have a bond as strong as 6K's, i do. alot. its just perhaps all the class gatherings and the 'rules' have been wearing people out that you know, turning up for a class gathering is no longer a novelty anymore. but no matter, i still love 6L alot, love all the memories. i never regret going to 6L, i never regret having so much fun with those guys there. i mean, lol, who would? or, who could? and that being said, perhaps not everyone had as much fun as me, or some has well, grown out of that 12-year-old definition of fun, but deep down i still hope everyone remembers their dear friends they made in their primary 6 class.

some of us are closer to each other and all, but i still believe we're still bonded as a class. just like 4 years ago. whatever we do, we do together. god that sounds damn cliche. even now, chatting on 6L fb page seems like such a random, insignicant thing, but it is actually representative of what we had as a class that thankfully, lasted all the way till now :) i'm grateful ^^ i don't wanna be too greedy, but hopefully, and hopefully, 6L gathering after O's would be the real, sincere, everyone-loves-each-other one. with perhaps haohan coming back from canada and everyone being there :)

well yeahh they weren't on my list of 'unsung heroes' but i guess you can now put them there :)

so anyway on friday i left school at 8.10 and guess what, i waited 1 hour for the bus to get home -.- omg its not like there weren't any buses. there were. but none of them stopped. especially 190. gosh and what's with all the single buses at that time of day? SMRT obviously knows many people are trying to get home from town/school/work, especially on a friday! chartering single buses, that comes at a super low frequency, what are you up to huh SMRT!! and you know what! there were like 3/4 'off service' buses. ?!?!? i simply cannot comprehend what the hell those buses are for. to patrol is it! huh omg grr grr grr

and guess how i eventually got home. i actually walked to the previous busstop to hope for a bus to pick me up. i mean, because the previous busstop is super ulooo and seeing i'm only one harmless girl they would at least stop and allow me up the bus. and in the end a 190 did! so the door opened, and i was planning already to somehow squeeze myself in, when the guy at the door told me 'wo bang ni an, ni cong hou mian shang' well it basically means i'll help you tap while you enter the bus from the back. and at that moment i was so thankful, especially for the guy initiating to help me and more so to the bus driver who actually stopped and well, thought of a way for me to get on.

well these bus drivers might just be doing their jobs but to put it more dramatically, they actually send us back home. they are the ones who send us back to our beloved. but yet do we take note of them? no. often and many a times we blame them and their employers for coming too late, too packed, or too ridicously (eg. 3 at a time) however we seldom think of those drivers, who have been sitting there for perhaps 8-9 hours already and are also wishing the same as us. to get home.

to people who rely on buses to go home, including yours truly, they are actually our saviours and we should thank them. so here, i want to mention, the bus driver, driving TIB 1162 X bus, bus service 190, who picked up a lone scgs girl at about 9.10pm last friday. he deserves some credit.

and meanwhile perhaps i should complain to SMRT so they can try to do something and improve this mess. AT THE SAME TIME complimenting this bus driver ^^

so yup actually i still want to talk about the airplane fliers who died yesterday because of an unfortunate mishap with their airplanes. but you guys should know what i wanna talk about. urgh wait i take 'unfortunate' back. people always use 'unfortunate' to describe such events. but for whoever's sake, they are more than unforuntate. they are tragic, devastating and just injustiable. why why why do such innocent people have to die when they obviously don't need to? what freak 'unfortunate' incident huh huh you think you can just get away with it by saying 'oh i'm sorry, its an unforunate incident. nobody wanted it to happen.' my ass like this can help any of the victims' families, like this can help the fans of those who died. like this can help at all. hmpf i seriously think such sacrifices are not worth it. what for crediting them after they died? for their heroic deaths? they are still deaths by the way.

i sound pretty unreasonable but that's what i feel. its so unfair to those people who died because they can't see the world again, they can't see their family again and they can't like do anything again. they die because of a freaking mistake. !&*^~^&@!*#)(*^ like hell money can take away the grief of the family! some say the families will feel better because at least they loved one died heroic but i pretty much think i won't be. my (insert whoever i don't wanna curse) died! ugh ugh ugh but that's the least they can do i think :/ to either make the culprits feel better, or to make the families feel better. whichever.

ok i'm done here. its 1am i need to go to bed!! sorry if this post disagreed with alot of your views but yeah.

good luck for o's guys!

life plans

2011-09-04T16:28:00.002+08:00

plan A (aka most ideal plan)

17: get nice, perfect, 'swee' grades for O's. anything that will give me a 2 points, but most preferably 9 A1s

19: graduate from jc with also perfect scores. (is it 4As or what?) at the same time, meet new friends, or reunite with old ones

23: graduate from an UK college. or NUS is fine. and most preferably also graduate with the highest ... (degree or bachelor or master or whatever i don't know how this works) in history ^^ actually, graduate from whatever college that can give me a well-paid job. which means more than 7k a month. (is this too greedy or usual?!) in college, meet new friends and british guys ^^ meanwhile attend any of rupert's signing meet or whatever.

26: there's still schooling right?

28: earn my first million. by high paying jobs, investments, buy sell house, buy sell car, crash into showbiz, anything that will give me money. even becoming the next rebecca black. no, no kidding. plus RB isn't that bad :)

30: somehow multiply my 1m into 9m. and spend 1/3-1/2 of it building my dream house in singapore for my family and friends :)

and somewhere along the way, meet a nice guy, hopefully share a romantic story, get married. hopefully that man will have a lot of money.

hahah its actually very exciting to think about your possible futures. imagine age 27. and imagine you. where would you be? in singapore? hawaii even? US? australia? cambodia? hongkong? repeat steps 1 and 2 for other ages.......

and well... plan B (aka if plan A fails then turn to this 'optimistic' plan)

.... haven't thought of it.

and well well guys its the 399th post! so significant!

and making life plans really helps! it motivates me to study hard for O's. given my crap prelim results, plus my future, plus my money ($.$) im sure i will be able to stay off the computer, some typical-predicatable-yet-i-still-wanna-watch taiwanese dramas and the tv.

so work hard too everybody! see you guys!

its august

2011-08-26T09:58:00.002+08:00

funny how i only realise this when august's coming to an end :/

time has literally disappeared this year. i clearly remember listening to cimorelli's cover of jingle bell rock last december and now its august already.

which also implies that its closer and closer to the O's. and i reallly should start panicking and mugging and clocking 12 hours a day because my prelim results is totally devastating. l1r5 of 15 wow how am i supposed to get to 6 (or even 9 A1s) PLUS i failed history :( noooooooooo how now!! i got a bloody 7 and who knows how many Cs i have. its worse because i like history so much and i failed the subject. bloody hell i didn't even fail math or any science! urgh but in a way i'm kind of glad i failed history. i failed a subject that i like. which means i will have the motivation to study it again and again and try to pull it up to an A1. if i actually failed physics or bio i may just totally give up. but ah well, i guess a 46 for history is a wake up call that i should really can down to studying and focusing. its 2 months - 2 days to the O levels i still have time! (hopefully)

yup and HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO RUPERT GRINT!!! ^^ freaking 23!!! ^^ his birthday was on the 24th for all you guys who doesn't know. heehee and its confirmed he has a girlfriend :(( on one hand i'm sad (plus to me the girl doesn't suit him but ok i respect his wants and wishes) but on the other i'm kinda glad because i've actually never heard of him having a proper girlfriend in all the years. he did have some, but he says those relationships only lasted for a few weeks. annnnnnd well he smokes :((((( WHY WHY WHY WHY WHY i really hate smokers but i guess in the UK and the states everybody smokes, even females, so ok if its common and its a culture, then i wouldn't deduct marks off him. hahaha who am i to deduct anyway. i'm fine with it so long he's not addicted to it and well, i won't ever get together with a smoker :( not saying that i actually had a fair chance of getting together with rupert in the first place. haiz but he looks damn buff and his biceps are damn hot. eh his everything is hot. *hyperventilating* heheheh

right well choir farewell last saturday was sweet :)) not as teary as i thought it would be but yeah. it makes me really glad that all my juniors are like growing up and taking charge of the choir and has done this especially for us. even though its kind of a mandatory annual thing already, but still its different every year :) i wanted to run around but ok apparently they weren't allowed so we just played splat, charades, pass the parcel (anything else?) in the music room. and sec 3s, 2s and 1s performed. sec 2s even sang 'somewhere only we know' with a slideshow of us playing in the background. awwww

yup ok anyway mdm goh says its time to 'unplug the wire from the computer' so i guess i will control myself and try not to be online so often. for all the sec 4s out there, good luck and all the best best best for O's. (why am i saying this now lol) and scgs sec 4 cohort let's study like shit and prove the teachers wrong. ^^

see you guys soon!

prelims are over + last saturday date with gigi

2011-08-13T22:17:00.002+08:00

hi everybody!!

prelims are over! hahaha i bet all other school students are still slogging and dreading their coming of prelims. while well, let's not say i can enjoy myself, but at least, the final hurdle before the finish line is over. now its just... a matter of running and persevering for another 100 metres or so before O's can finally be declared over.

so anyway our whole level got a massive lecture from principal and whoever relevant right after our last paper yesterday. it wasn't an encouraging talk, and looks like all the staff and the higher authorities are not really placing high hopes and big bets on our level this year even though we have one of the highest tee scores. can't be helped, we are all born in the year of pig. (hahaha what a dry joke) anyway it seems as though the teachers and all actually know what we do and say in the virtual world. which means, they know and keep tabs on our actions, whereabouts, and comments. that's scary. and its possible that one of them is actually reading this now. but oh well, i will still blog because this is my only way of distress and perhaps, only way out from a stressed school life.

ok anyway after school went to balmoral plaza to eat. saw 4SE dudes there and mrs choo and the other chem teachers. apparently mrs mohan was there too 0.0 stayed for lunch and till around 5 plus with sam cheng inez. others like son and rachel hau left early.

yeah and today i just went out by myself and walked around causeway point in search for presents. i was told and wanted to practice oral but that didn't end up very well because i ended up borrowing books and reading them in macs. plus i was so physically exhausted after walking around causeway point for an hour. worst thing? nothing was reaped :( i couldn't find anything for the people that i wanted to buy presents for. and i spent awhile at popular just looking at board games and regretting that i don't have enough money or it is not worth it to buy since there's hardly anyone to play with me at home.

yup and last saturday date with kailin. 'date', sort of. we cancelled our saturday study sessions because most of them didn't work out well. we either end up talking or slacking or if not, just le-paking around (in her words) but regardless this 2 months were fun and my saturdays were occupied :) the only bad thing i took away from these sessions were just the tiredness and the growing dread and disgust at macdonalds food. macs food totally do not appeal to me (or i can safely say for both of us) now so urgh. but i predict somewhere in the next few months i'll be reduced to returning to macs again because there is simply no space in the libraries . like literally man. today i went to woodlands library which has like a few levels and even a small cafe inside. so you can imagine how big and well, spaceful it is. but every single seat was taken up (i swear) and people were just sitting on floors and making the best out of some seats that were obviously meant for people to read, and not do their work. so yup, i guess i'm rendered with macs as the only choice since its less expensive than starbucks. i might even consider going back to school. but school is starting to turn me off too because it just reminds me of the imminent major exam and the coming endless scoldings and wake up calls by teachers every time i step into the school and look at the buildings.

well ok, despite macs and the food, saturday study sessions with gigi were generally fun. i've never been insulted so many times in my life before and every saturday practically just turned into some being bullied day by choo kai lin. but ok i shall not complain and appreciate her. ... yeah perhaps think about how she ignored her blinding and worse-than-death headache to come out to meet me for hor fun today. ok i'm exaggerating. ya fine la then we talked and ate and blah and went home. hahah i love talking. with friends, especially when we have the liberation (well, slight one) to. i feel very relaxed whenever i do that so ^^ ok i shall not sound as if i'm not gonna see her again. we're still meeting on wednesdays.

OMG I JUST REMEMBERED. SAM GAVE ME A PRESENT YESTERDAY!! ^^ ^^ ^^ WAIT FOR IT. WAIT FOR IT. ta dah!!! its posters of rupert grint as ron!!! omg weeeee i've always wanted some. i do have, but only a few. but hers is damn freaking clear and super awesome. thanks sam ong!! i'll totally miss you when you leave for the UK. but well, all the best and i know you'll adapt just fine there :) hehhe and well while you're happily getting ready for a brand new refreshing chapter of your life, we guys here have to just SLOG AND SLOG AND GO THROUGH THE MONOTONOUS BEAT OF SCHOOL LIFE. homework. exams. homework. exams. homework. exams. note that there ain't even 'sleep' or 'eat' because seriously, exams and studying are actually taking over our lives now.

oh yeah! national day this year actually seems rather good! like to my opinion its the best as comapred to those in recent years! but unfortunately most do not stand on the same side as me. they think that singapore's ndp is just getting worse and worse every year and speaks as if singapore is gonna be led to degregation soon. or just.. humiliation and utter shame from our forced, and well, try-too-hard nd parades. what i think it was good was actually.... i have no idea actually. their costumes? (but some were disgusting) their storyplot? i don't know, or perhaps i love singapore much more than i thought. but definitely not the novelty of seeing sharon au's face on screen again. for heck sake's her coming back was just ttly random. PLUS they didn't give credit to sylvia ratonel, whom i heard was the original singer of this year's ndp song. i didn't see her at all at the parade!

ok enough talking. i'm quite tired of facing and looking at the screen so see you guys soon! good luck to all for prelims and good luck to scgs friends for prelims results that we will be receiving this coming week :)

happy birthday singapore!!

2011-08-08T18:15:00.002+08:00

and zoey as well!! heheh hope you liked the scrawly note i gave you. hahahaha

OMG GUYS DO YOU KNOW. HARRY POTTER AND THE DEATHLY HALLOWS PART 2 IS BEHIND AVATAR AND TITANIC IN THE LIST OF HIGHEST GROSSING FILMS?!?!?!

do you know that!! it beat like LoR, PoTC, Toy story, twilight and whatever crap movies. woohooo!!! harry potter is number 3!! omg it can even beat titanic when the dvd comes out and all ^^ OMG EVERYONE REJOICE!! hehehhehe

well reason for my absence on this blog is of course, prelims. amath physics and history is screwed yeah. i'm especially sad for history cause i love it so much yet i did so badly T_T regardless, results only coming next week (oh prelims ain't over yet) so just praying for miracles.

last national day today in sc :( it was fun though cause we got to watch all the stuff, instead of being in the choir and performing some songs. and the chengmun peiyi aisyah seah and kim, those pple that i sat with, were damn enthu so weets weets ^^ god i feel so happy hehe i love national days ^^ *rocking out* SO WILL YOU SWIM THE CURRENT!!! WILL YOU SCALE NEW HEIGHTS!!!!

then had mass dance which was damn enthu at the beginning. but then later everybody got freaking tired. i swear we repeated the song/dance steps millions of times.

ok yeah went to cck after that with shujun and ruoning. sucks no bubble tea!!! :(( but we made it up by buying popcorn after that :)

zoey's bday dinner was cool. hahaha pizzahut is actually a bit screwed up. their service and accuracy i mean. but yeah it was damn expensive too!! me and zy had to each fork out 25 bucks man!

and wow jlo actually acted in a movie once?!

ok bored liao gtg! see you guys soon after prelims!!

once again, happy birthday singapore!!

harry potter and the deathly hallows part 2 and... a bit of self discovery

2011-07-16T20:15:00.004+08:00

hi! i guess 10 days to prelims isn't a good time to blog about something you've just recently discovered about yourself or about something that has been kept inside you for every long. but i guess since i'm screwed for prelims either way, might as well pen (or rather, type) down whatever i have in my brain right now.

today pa called me when i was at macs. i thought i might just burst out crying there and then since i haven't spoken or seen him in a long long while. like months ok. and its cool that he remembers i love harry potter. well reason why i haven't spoken to him for damn long i can't really tell you although i really really want to. for a long while now. i really wanna tell everybody about him and well, our r'ship but i'm forbidden to. i'm kinda tired of making reasons but yeah i just tell people i'm not as close to him as i am to my mum. which is true. but yeah, even though i thought i would sob i didn't. i'm almost thinking i'm numb to not seeing him now. and as long as my brain don't wonder off to why my family is so different or why i don't see pa that often or imagine a really perfect happy family for myself, i guess i'm fine . i really don't want to be numb about it though because i still want to have feelings. but i suppose being numb just makes me further away from wallowing in my self-pity and crying for my devastated fate all the time. well, i miss my father, i'm not sure how i feel about him, but i want a father in my life :( (yes i do have one just not the usual one) and if you guys readers can infer what's going on from the paragraph then ok good. just don't ask me anything when you see me. and no, he's not in prison.

and well this year was a rather sensitive year for me. i don't know why maybe i'm maturing or i'm 16 or whatever but i've been complaining a lot. have been. which means i'm over it now, or at least i'm trying my best to. you know, scgs has a lot of rich people. but i'm not one. over the last 3 years i've kinda accepted/heck it and just go along with the flow, but i'm not sure why this year i'm overly sensitive that my aim for the last dunno how many months was to become a billionaire in future. (cue billionaire music) i've been asking my mum how come we're not rich and i know now i suck. why did i even complain/whine/pity myself. i should be happy for what i have (this is so cliche but i'm too lazy to think of sth innovative, not that this post focuses on coming up with new quotes but yeah). i have a freaking i don't even know how to describe fantastic mum, a good (i hope he loves me) brother, and a dad. and i have relatives who invites me to watch hp with them, and relatives who can just talk to me. and i have 2 grandmas that i love so damn much. (i just realised) and i'm ok at my studies, even though i need to work harder, i have a tv, a computer, a bed, a whatever you name it. so i really shouldn't be complaining anymore. i'm sorry ma i won't ever. (not that you'll be reading this) but yeah, i have grown up.

(but regardless i still wanna be a freaking billionaire so that i can have a theatre in my house and so that ma can be proud of me and live happily with me next time)

yeah ok. ok all emotional whatever crap aside.

harry potter on friday was just undescribable.

the movie itself, and i'm trying to be as diplomatic, from a viewer's point of view as possible, was just godly. and freaking epic. but i think its sadder than its epic. there were many instances/clips in the movie that were so heartbreaking. i did cry at a few scenes and was super emotional. for all those who are considering whether to watch it or not: do. if you're worried about prelims then ok fine go after it but i urge you to go now because its seriously sth that must not be missed. i cried in the movie theatre when it ended (i miss rupert grint's name in the credits!!!) cause it finally struck me that there ain't gonna be anymore harry potter movies. dan rad emma watson and rupert grint aren't gonna work together again for potter shows. :'((( that's worth a cry isn't it. but i'm damn proud i led an applause after it ended. when i heard marquisha's 'why nobody clap one' i couldn't help it and i just clapped. thank god people followed. i even wanted to say 'way to go, harry!' but ahh well i was too embarrassed. i feel damn proud to be a harry potter fan, and even prouder for harry potter is such a huge massive successful franchise. not only that, it has fans everywhere. even though i once thought i was the only harry potter fan in singapore, i think not now, for there are so many around. i feel good to be able to relate to some people and to those who clapped along with me in the theatre for the end of an epic era and a wonderful generation, i love you, which makes me love harry potter even more.

ok sorry i think i was too dramatic the previous para but whatever i said is true. whatever i said i felt is true. yeah watched harry potter with kirsten, chan, sonia, sarah and yunru! woohoo nicest bunch ever! all of them (i think) were so emotional and cried in the movie! (also proven when sonia started laughing hysterically halfway to stop her sobs) oh damn why didn't we take a group picture! i tried my best to dress up. i wore a hat, and a shirt with the hogwarts houses on it (given by kiran!) and well, the cohort jacket that happened to be red/maroon, well basically gryfinddor's colour.

after the show yeah went to eat and talked about many things. to sum up: my best friday night ever in 2011. rock on guys and long live harry potter :)

:')

oh you thought it ended? HA no!! lol soon lah. anyway got our cohort jacket. woots woots love it. colour's freaking nice i think i'm gonna wear it every moment of my life now. i think i grow very easily attached to people of the same kind. by same kind i mean, pple of the same age, same batch, same level. this happened in p6. i love 6L to the max max but i loved the whole p6 level too. and in sec 4, its even more prominent since i'm more aware and i know more people across the level. i think main reason's because of choir. sec 4 lvl in choir (ya actually we should give ourselves a name its so long to type in 'sec 4 lvl in choir'!) i love all the people there, even though there are some distinctions. but that was because of some misunderstandings i've come to realised and well, put everything aside, i guess i love and treasure all of them. and across the level there are so many potential friends, so many friends who are friends of my friend, which makes it even more magical and to the heart. yeah but i think that's just me. haha i get attached to people (whether individual or group) very easily.

well i should go now. it was a damn long post alright. hope you guys enjoyed your weekend and woo 10 more days to prelims! push on guys! i shall see you after prelims :)

p.s: i swore that after harry potter i will work my freaking ass off and i'm gonna fulfill that. i'm gonna work my head off and do well for prelims.

the end

2011-07-08T20:47:00.003+08:00

oh no :'(( i've just watched like a few A FEW (only) interviews on the red carpet premiere in london yesterday and omg its so freaking sad :( i know it'll just be devastating for people who have followed HP for 10 years and more, but ahh shit i'm so sad (*&*&^%&#*&^_)(*&

its gonna be such a cry worthy thing when i watch HP next week. shucks its really the end. NOOOOOO I DON'T WANT IT TO END!!! why must i take O's when the last movie comes out?! omg so unfair :((( grrrrr rupert grint ah i love the friendship between the whole cast and all (you can see it so obviously in all their interviews and stuff). even if people say like rupert and emma go well together (i agree too) but wa i just want a friendship like theirs, like the one between dan rupert and emma :( tut tut

shit harry potter and rupert grint love you foreverrrrrrrrr boooohooo i feel like crying now :'(

omg this is the best premiere ever everybody's (including rupert and jo rowling and all) so emotional. god even though this is the last this is really the best. and omg you might not even know what the shit i'm talking about but lol just don't read the posts i'm gonna post these few days. its all gonna be about hp.

and sry my previous post was so out of character but its really me. hhaa rupert grint is just so amazing and just so surreal. *dreams*

RUPERT GRINT

2011-07-08T20:25:00.002+08:00

RUPERT GRINT IS BEYOND HOT. HE'S LIKE THE SEXIEST MAN ALIVE.

OMMMMG EMMA WATSON IS SO FREAKING LUCKY. SO FREAKING FREAKING LUCKY. (plus her looks plus her grades plus her every perfection goddd)

but who cares omg rupert!!! oh my shit rupert grint's haircut really really freaking hot. even amierah says he's hotter. shizz i'm so glad rupert grint's my idol. OMG HEEEHEEEHEE

shit ok im freaking excited for next friday. rupert grint's voice is really hot when you listen it through the theatres. SHIT SHIT SHIT arghhhhh

harry potter bookings

2011-07-04T01:07:00.005+08:00

oh noooooo i'm so stupid!! why didn't i go check when online bookings are out for HP!! now omg like the town cinemas are like almost filled lah. and the seats left are like.. damn front seats :( this is no good!

plus i can't immediately book now cause i'm still gathering/confirming how many people are going! AND i can't check how filled are the seats for cine cause there's apparently some technical error for that. grr pfft grr.

i really really hope not many seats are filled up :( but i think they might be cause its just the 2nd day.

AND OMG YOU KNOW WHAT. GV vivo is actually having a HP marathon?! like from 13th july 10am, they'll play all the HP movies, provide you lunch dinner whatever and then you watch the final one 14th july morning?! SHIT AND YOU KNOW WHAT 9/10 of the seats are filled up. crap man if i were free i'd definitely go. and omg i just found out that they are so many harry potter fans in singapore!!!

but on a side note i'm really damn freaking excited beyond words, i can't sit still and all. but ok i'm motivated :) from now till whenever i'm gonna watch the movie, i'm gonna work harder, and slack less so that i will deserve that HP break about 2 weeks from now. shit no its 10 days! *&^%&*$*^&%(*+!@_!@#@

ok see you guys!! go watch HP too man!

edit: SHIT SHIT SHIT cineleisure 7.40 15th july is like... almost completely filled. left front row. grrr NOOO my only hope now is GV at plaza sing. *prays prays*

ok phew plaza sing so far has only 3D out for advance sales. so i guess i'll check everyday till it comes out and then i'll book. but pray that they actually show the 2D one too though.

sick.

2011-07-01T21:39:00.003+08:00

hi! ok so first week of sch done, how's everybody feeling!!

well omg after all the mocks and those coming mocks that i know i should be studying for, i kinda feel guilty for being on the computer and blogging. but i guess blogging is something like a platform that i make use of to distress and just to express/vent my thoughts and feelings so its healthy :)) plus i don't watch so much tv now!

ok well i found another damn damn funny video!! haha its still just for laughs for ROLFMAO HAHHAHAHHA part comes at 1:15. omg its seriously damn frreaking hilarious so go watch it!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jZ_9L_Zi8-Y yeap. and wow you can actually ctrl z on the website bar.

right well i realised after this week there are so so so so many things i need to brush up on. i think the reason why i'm not doing well its not because i don't know the concepts (well not boasting that i'm like some frigging genius or whatever) but just when i study i just kind of 'look through' the book or whatever material. thus i don't pay attention to details and all the crap. that's why when answering a question i always feel that i'm somewhere there and somewhere not there. and i can never come out from a test feeling damn confident, especially for math and sciences. so :/ i guess i really need to put in more effort.

physics test today and guess what. i slept for 11hours last night. freak!!! omg i just couldn't wake up, and obviously i didn't study for it. and today's paper was pretty crap so... i just hope i don't fail. if i do, mdm goh will definitely point me out and lecture again but i'm learning how to take her lectures in stride. its like, every single time (at least 99%) she meets us she lectures. ...?! well for some other people they might just shut their ears off or some actually get motivated by it, but sometimes its really weary. can you imagine starting a day and then you get sorta 'motivational talk' by your ft. its so demoralising. and when she stares at you with her penetrating eyes you just feel bad and guilty even though you've done nothing wrong?! ok i'm not saying her scoldings are always for the worse, no no sometimes when it comes at the right time its good, its inspirational, but every time is really... wa i cannot take it anymore. but yes i do realise and acknowledge the fact that she's the only teacher in her department who scolds people and thus tries to sorta lead away from our disastrous marks. and i'm not being totally ungrateful to her ok. when you go 1-on-1 with her she's actually reallly nice and almost lovely so i appreciate. but her lectures really... its pressurising sometimes. (well at least for those who are doing badly in her class -.-)

i realise i always daydream a lot. and when i do, i think of scenarios where i appear rather glorious or famous or cool or smart. hahaha, not even gonna try to hide it but yeah sometimes its really funny/makes me really happy or as if there's hope. and i'll desire to make them happen. like i would think of scenarios with friends where we're laughing like shit or over something witty or stupid i just thought of. or i would think of being a total rebel, standing up to the teacher or a friend i can't really stand, having freaking epic and leaving-the-other-party-entirely-speechless or gobsmacked comebacks. and then not only i won't get expelled, i would get a glorious shadow-in-the-sunset standing ovation from my long-time-oppressed-yet-do-not-dare-do-anything friends. or i would imagine scenarios where i'm like emma watson (working with rupert grint) and i conduct interviews with myself or yeah. things like that. its really pathetic but i think i'm deriving a lot of my happiness from here. its like wishing and laughing at untrue, possibly not happening things, but who cares. as long as i'm happy and not cutting myself :)

of course i do get a lot of joy from real life friends and all :)

well right title of this blogpost is sick. well, it was meant to be about sick of schools and mocks and hot humid dry afternoons in class. but after typing whatever i just typed above i feel better so i guess i'm more positive and less whiny now. ^^ see! blogging helps ok!

right ok i guess i'll end here. 14 DAYS TO HARRY POTTER! shoot i'm so excited when i think of rupert grint and hearing his voice. and of course, the epic finale to the hp series. ^^ ^^ ^^

ok bye! hope you guys are doing well!

take a 20 min break

2011-06-18T18:42:00.003+08:00

omg hi guys have a lot of damn funny things to show you! hahahahaha i seriously just sat in front of my computer for the last 45 min and laugh to youtube videos. HAHAHHA okok

1.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d2yD4yDsiP4 ok this is the inception trailer, only difference is that all the sound effects are replaced by people just acapella-ing and doing all those cool beat boxy stuff. but omg! first watch it. read the very first comment. watch it again. HAHAHAHAHAH (i think the first comment will be the same right?)

BWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRR HAHAHAHA

2.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bRsVlOpz3Yc this is one of the just for laughs gags episode. like one of the case. its seriously my favourite hahahah please watch it! i know everybody's been studying like heck now so watch it and have a laugh!!

3.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mY-hU-hfL_E&feature=related a compilation of the funniest just for laughs gags cases. and its seriously damn freaking hilarious! watch it please! its supposed to have 2 parts, but i can't find the other part, so i guess the uploader took it down or something

kk last but not least..... this is not funny lah but its really freaking freaking epic.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VG32Wog8sAk&feature=player_embedded#at=138 watch you wil not never never ever regret!!

gawwwwwd can't wait for july 14th!!!!!

ok bye guys!! hopefully this post helped you distress. haha

edit: RUPERT GRINT HAS SUCH A HOT NEW HAIRCUT!! OMGGGG

dani shay

2011-06-12T18:16:00.000+08:00

OMG MY NEW FOUND IDOL!! CHECK OUT DANI SHAY ON YOUTUBE!!!

she's a justin bieber look alike, but omg her songs are way nicer!!! weeehee! she recently auditioned for america's got talent. haha will be watching her ^^

i have something to say

2011-06-08T20:15:00.005+08:00

ok hang on i have many things to say. and they are not good :( so guys if you don't wanna be demoralised or sick of my self pity.. i guess you can go youtube kevjumba!

first word: shit. i've been thinking about this for a while now and i'm really scared to admit it (for admitting makes it even more real). admit that all along i've been deceiving myself. in regards to studies. (ok i know i know that's all my life is about ok happy) as in, i'm doing quite badly in mocks now, and not that i know my marks, but just the process of doing a test. i mean, you can already feel how you did right? but the thing is, i feel like i'm putting in a lot of effort. like i'm studying enough. but when i think about it seriously, i wonder, am i? it could actually turn out to be i'm just deceiving myself to think that i study alot so that i'll be happy or comforted or some shit. but looking at all the study sessions i have had with many different people, and when i study myself, i wonder whether i'm doing like seriously all that i can do. but well i guess i am not because if i am i wouldn't be even suspecting myself of cheating/lying to me.

and i just told my mum all that i just typed. you know what she said? its ok, don't stress out too much, just pass can already. WTHECK omg i love my mother so much but wth just pass?! O lvls just pass?! might as well quit school now and work in macs. she said that i guess what she hoped to be a comforting tone. but i think she's like me, or i'm like her, we don't express our words of comfort well. (wow) its like i feel so out of place when i try to comfort somebody. i really wanna help her, but the correct words just won't come out. yeah anyway, i know my mother definitely won't want a just pass grade for my O's so i should just continue to keep motivated and not give up because of her. :)) actually the main motivator behind my drive to get 6 A1s is her. i just really wanna do well for my family.

ahh well ok 3rd thing. ohh behold my road to self discovery. lol i might be slow but i realised today that we should never judge a person/form an impression of someone already just by what another is saying/rumours. i mean, you don't even know the person. so i guess bottom line is leave many many room for you to get to know that person. so what if everybody hates her, or so what if everybody talks badly about her gross habits or just disgusting behaviour (i'm exaggerating), you can still hang out with her. i mean, sure it may seem that you're uncool and down a few rigs the social ladder in school (wa i feel damn chim) but if you don't even wanna try, how will you know? for all you know she's the one who's there for you when you're feeling the worst, when you're experiencing low-tide.

ok for all who has read until here. i know people hates self-degrading posts (in regards to my first point), so i guess i should degrade others now. HAHAA no la not that bad, just wanna say something i saw yesterday.

so yesterday i was out at macs studying. then came 2 teenage girls, put down their things, hang around for a while, and asked me to take care of their things. so i said ok. my first impression was they looked very mature and they seemed to be very sweet/good girls. like normal, young, serene, sweet teenage girls. ok so after a while they came back, chit chat, and then i heard one saying to the other "zou, qu chou yan". which basically meant come, let's go smoke. and i was like what the *^&^#^#$@?!?!?! i completely did not expect them to actually smoke. with their looks and everything. and you know how old are they!

this. was on their table. THEY WERE FREAKING 14 YEARS OLD!!!! AND THEY'RE SMOKING?! omg la ok i know you can't just judge based on a geog textbook on their table but hey i saw one of them doing stem and leaf diagrams. anyway did you get the impact. i didn't directly say 14 years old cause i wanted you to feel the impact. omg thinking about it they might be 13... oh god why?! why smoke!! seriously smokers please stop now, it'll only kill you and kill you further.

k la fine give you chance you'll end up living in a drain. k nvm longgang ok. you can call it le longgang. ... YEAH but what i am trying to say is don't smoke!! omg if the government is putting in so much efforts in trying to stop pple from smoking, why don't they just not sell cigarettes?! but ahh 99.9% they're probably keeping it for economic revenue.

ok i've talked so much i don't feel as bad about my grades now as compared to when i started this blogpost. i guess, i can't do anything about done tests. but actually the more i say i can't do anything or cry over spilled milk, the more i won't do anything! the more i won't get any motivation to actually start improving myself! and actually i really believe that saying 'can't do anything now that the test is over' is seriously something to deceive yourself even though its true. so guys stop saying it! do something now!!

thank you so much for your time seriously. i don't know how many pple actually have the patience to bear through my whole entire crap blogpost but thanks for reading ^^ even those spammers who spams my chatbox. (like real)

ok ya bye!! everybody in a hard patch right now, don't give up yo!! your friend here is struggling too so i guess we'll just have to grow some strong backbone and get over the mudslide. ^^

thru-orh

2011-06-04T21:34:00.006+08:00

june is here!

omg first week of extended over!! had physics mock yesterday and i just don't understand how come i studied already but then i'm still not confident about how i did. >:( mdm goh says sy is doing damn well, but that's only the majority. which means there are a few little pathetic minorities still struggling :/ but ahh i did what i can let's hope i just don't fail :/

i'm slowly coming to terms that i'm taking O's this year already (i know, its late) and i'm trying very hard to register the fact that my life now is just supposed to be wake up at 6am, start studying from 7am to 10pm, and then sleep. and repeat the cycle. for another at least 4-5 months. gosh its hard but the first step is always the harder so i guess to all the sec 4s: don't give up!! gain momentum and everything will be better ^^

shit sam tsui's jar of hearts cover is just so sad :(

oooh and yesterday i found a few of my other childhood songs through blue!! its amazing i'm so happy that i was born in 1995 and i grew up with all the boyband songs and not like bad romance or something. ^^

right went to macs today in the afternoon to study with boss (well yeah i lost to her at bingo so i've to call gigithat now, but hahaha this will probably be the one and only time). i feel so damn bad, i'm so lazy and i think i'm influencing everybody who studies with me. urgh!!!

Resolutions till the O Levels

Be a good study partner - cannot slack, cannot sleep, cannot say 'tired', cannot mention movies, cannot suggest anything stupid, cannot influence boss to not do her work, must motivate boss and myself (shit i can't help it i'm such a good employee), must motivate friends, must be quiet

Keep the drive and motivation to study

Study for learning, and not O's. (but come on who am i kidding, at the end of the day it all boils down to O's)

Do not give up

Keep healthy and happy

Think positive (?!)

Do not get too comfortable or complacent.

bring it on O's! i'm so ready for you! engine starting! gogogo!!!!! (...)

ohhh 2 more things!! after boss left today i felt so sian and tired but omg i was almost instantly revived when i heard this boy in front of me trying to pronounce 'through'. hahaha there was a teenage (plus minus) girl teaching him, probably his sis or something, and he was doing an english paper. he was about.. 10? so after he painstakingly manage to spell out 'through', his sis (assuming la) asked him to say it. and OMG he was like "thru-orh". HAHAHAHAHAHAHA like really threw-oorrrruhhh HAHAHAHAH i was hiding my laughter behind my shirt.

next yay i feel damn shiok!!! my hair is so short now!! ^^ no need to tie hair, and somemore pple say i look cooler ^^ meheheeh

k la bye needa go bathe liao

edit: i realised something damn cool. when i press my title, meaning 'yiling' i actually go back to my homepage!! wow and all along i didn't know this!!

nsync

2011-05-29T16:15:00.000+08:00

i realised many of the songs i know are from nsync. well, many of the songs that i had known but forgot and only remember them now cause i just happen to stumble upon some youtube covers of those songs. yeah well in short those are my childhood songs which i think is like 1000 times better than today's electrical and too much auto-tune songs. so yeah i actually went back to watch 'it's gonna be me' music video (by nsync) and omg i almost cried. well i don't think its supposed to be that moving, but yeah its very touching. ^^

ok well yeah first movie of the year yesterday!!! gosh i love watching movies and i felt so deprived. both of movies and the popcorn ;) so yes kung fu panda 2!! that po seriously just trying his luck throughout the whole movie lah, but i can say its a really nice movie. only difference is that the movie's almost made up of 10 climaxes that occurs every second, instead of the usual build up, sadness, lose hope and then bam revealation! and then runs off to kill the baddie. kfpanda 2's like fighting throughout. but yeah the panda is so damn cute.

well ok technically i wasn't supposed to watch a movie anytime near this time. it actually started out as a mugging session with gigi in macs. but then we got damn sian-ed and just lost the drive that we had in the morning. so we just went to watch a movie instead. haha its better anyway so monday we can study too ^^ lol i think i'm a really bad influence on her. or haha we're bad influences on each other. but it won't happen again next week! with all the mocks and all.

ok its sunday at 4 and i barely done anything. i'm so screwed. grr i just typed out 2 russian essays and then that's all. OH WAIT I WENT TO CUT MY HAIR!!! wooohoo its damn short now im so happy and excited ^^

ok la bye go already needa do chinese (not for o's). :D good luck to all taking chinese o's tomorrow!!!

cut hair cut hair cut hair

2011-05-27T22:33:00.003+08:00

omg im so excited!!! i'm getting a hair cut tomorrow!! my hair's gonna become short ^^ hehehhe actually i think i'm just cutting on impulse but haha who cares if it turns out bad it'll grow back out anyway.

i just don't want it to become like a bob, i want it straight!!! and short! woohoo i can't wait i'm gonna cut first thing in the morning!!!

hehehehe this is by far the most exciting thing i've experienced ever since syf results so yay spicing up my life :DD

oh and happy birthday to belinda/taiwanese/maggie hu/apple! HAHAHA

cockroaches infestation

2011-05-25T16:51:00.003+08:00

omg my void deck is like littered with cockroaches. dead cockroaches, some still struggling, on their backs. seriously omg its damn gross. when i say littered, i mean like there are definitely easily more than 30 of them. gosh have no idea what went on. maybe there was like a feast and all the cockroaches came and then they were all killed my the cleaner or something... urgh (but on a sidenote i would love to see belinda's reaction)

right so originally i was planning not to post anymore in the month of may, so that i will keep my total blog posts at 7. (loook ---->) but then yeah i figured why am i even doing that so here i am. and plus i finished what is on my memo so this is like a break yeah. but i swear i'm gonna finish this blog post in 5 minutes and then go bathe.

oooh and guess what! i found a study partner!! woohoo! just the next day of the previous blog post, i found one and guess who! (ok hang on i'm thinking what to call her....) k la fine kailin for the sake of identification. but yeah, gigi's a nicer name :) so yes meeting gigi at macs this saturday muahahha hopefully it turns out well. omg if not it'll be like the damn slack, laze around and sail boats day like last saturday. hahah oh well :)

right i'm starting to miss choir (just the singing and all) and the sec 4 choir members now :( urgh i want like a choir recess (one that we actually eat and not practise hahaha) or as facebook says, choir dinner ^^!! argh

ok its 4.59 now. just good luck to those taking mother tongue O's next week ok!!! ^^ do your best and score well! (just outdo yourself and peak ;))

right and oh zing please be reading this (i doubt you actually still read my blog so ok i'm gonna tell you about it) it was an awesome day staying back with you yesterday ^^ even though both of us, or maybe i was too high and whatever, we (hopefully its not a one-sided thing?!) had much fun!! hahaha i finally know how to pronouce nigahiga (nigahahhaha) haha and well, barney might be a pink dinosaur after all. you never know ;) oh thanks for the california roll!! ehhehe and very proud of you today for 2.4! i saw many people walking but you didn't! you ran like shit and even though you were on the brink of like... i dunno physical and mental exhaustion + break down, you completed it! woo! and you completed last round in 1 min!! all thanks to me actually ;) hehe ok ya i know i seldom express my 'love' to you but yeah this is a rare chance so better cherish it. next one will probably come with the next bday letter/eraser, but the idea is currently non-existent now. hahaha ok maybe it will come at class gathering 10 years on. so yeah ^^ see la its 5.05!!

k ya bye thanks for reading! :)

shrugs

2011-05-20T22:15:00.003+08:00

ahh i should try to either find a study partner or stop going to libraries on my own. somehow its starting to get depressing without someone to talk to :( or maybe its only for this couple of weeks. ohh well i should probably try changing my study venues from -take-bus-distance libraries to just downstairs. its not too hot (cause there're fans) but sometimes its damn noisy. haiz

i feel so sad/disturbed now cause somehow the show that i asked my mum to tape wasn't taped. urgh :!@$*E^&!(@*@*(^ASKH

ok nvm so i guess recent talk would be end of choir 'journey' for us sec 4s. honestly i don't feel anything yet, probably cause it hasn't sunk in or i'm just too heartless. lol but no matter to me what's most impt's that at least we've been a part of SC choir and contributed. contributed to it hell alot i must say. gwh for the first ever time since history (even if the judges are lenient, well at least we're a gwh. and we're on par with others) and well, the ending is just i guess, an end to this chapter (i hate to use the word chapter cause its so corny but there're no other words for it) of our lives. so i guess at least its a beautiful peaceful end. just remember the memories, and remember the friends. ^^

right today is generally a melancholic/damn sian/a tinge of why-is-this-happening day. haiz my show T_T lol and chem spa was tricky...

2011-05-14T18:45:00.000+08:00

ahhhh should i go to woodlands or not?!?! its already 7 and library's closing at 9 but i wanna borrow some books!! tut tut i think i should then i can bring my TFA there. but then again! going alone today does not seem appealing :( and i haven't bathed and all so by the time i reach there it'll be like... damn late liao?! grah grah grah and i'm tired and am too lazy to leave house. but if i don't then i'll just plonk in front of the tv and watch anything. i won't get any work done. GRRRR but ok nvm go settle my stomach first. NOM NOM NOM YUMMMM i'm eating my saliva (-.-)

oh and happy 16th to haohan!

family day

2011-05-14T14:01:00.005+08:00

basically family day consisted of these things.

walking, hanging around in the hot sun, going to stalls buying food, and then going back to some shade, playing taboo, sweat, more sun, more heat, and a bit of rain. so yeah i guess those who ponned/someone managed to wriggle yourself out of this i can safely say you missed nothing. it was actually almost a waste of time. and money. and damn it i was so tired after that that i overslept on the bus and ended up in bpp.

well ok on a more emotional note, there's many irreplaceable people in life. although you know, people have cliques or are just more close to some friends than other. well that's of course. its natural. but well its sometimes because of this that when you want so much to become a good friend of someone, its hard, cause she already has an irreplaceable bunch of like forever-love (hahah sorry can't think of a better word) good buddies. so sometimes if you try too hard, it can really get pretty devastating at the end when it doesn't turn up well. so i guess moral of the story: cherish whoever you have now. because at the end of the day, you will find out that they are the ones who count. they are the ones who are actually so much better than what you thought they were. they are the ones who love you as much as you love them. and most importantly, learn to accept.

mm i'm so drained i think i might just go back to sleep.

2011-05-14T13:58:00.001+08:00

Soon. Oh god how I hate that word! “We’ve started restoring the posts that were temporarily removed and expect Blogger to be back to normal soon.” Please man when the heck is soon?! And then when I see a freaking potential mind blowing/cute/adrenaline pumping – basically a movie trailer that I really like and at the end it’s written “coming soon”, I’m like f*** when is sooon!?

Argh yeah so blogger’s down and I’m reduced to writing on erm… microsoft word blogpost. Yeah

Haiz concert’s over and right in this instant I really desperately feel like running or just flying away to some remote island paradise with all the joys of life with my closet closest friends. No homework, no studies, no stress. No worries. Then there we’ll talk through the night, cook chickens together, bathe in the sea together, pee in the bushes together. And we’ll gossip, chit chat about futures, thinking of evil plans together and laughing so much that our sides hurt damn damn much. Hahaha it’s the ultimate dream. It will be almost like portugal/spain all over again, only this time is kinda tribal and I can choose who to take me with  but sometimes I just feel like going alone. Not that I’m emo or just get-away-from-me-you’re-gross-and-why-are-you-talking to me kind (lol) but I enjoy solitude. I don’t mind going home by myself (of course bpp gang is still rockin it pretty much) I don’t mind actually going out and shop/eat/hang around myself. I don’t mind hanging about in school/going to recess/eating alone. It’s kinda the time when you’ll feel a little amused and you’re so free to watch the people around you, watch the things that happen and be in the background for a little while. I love that feeling. I would actually call it freedom, because you’re not bound by anything to do anything. But just, you can listen to the you and only you, do what you want, and think what you want, without caring about the person beside you’s feelings. Just act on impulse and go for it. And it’ll feel damn good.

But yeah ok that’s for that. Concert today and I found a new found love for my brother!! He came!! Did not go back on his word. Haha first time I noticed him in front I was like ‘woah there, right that’s kinda way too front’ but whatever! He might have been interested in other performances than me but still I’m glad he came to support his lil sis! Wee even though we’re not best-friends close but still it means a lot! Of course I love my mum too. Speaking of which, I haven’t got down to doing what I was planning to say to her as mentioned a few days ago. Yay my friends might not be there/ no raras but I think well family members means about equal so yeah.

Ok last concert. How do I feel… well I guess I’m rather neutral about it. Either it hasn’t sunk in yet or it just doesn’t feel like the last ever thing we’ll do. Well technically it isn’t cause we still have trinity and cat high’s concert next week. I’ll definitely miss the sec 4s when it all ends though. Even though we’re quite split up but I guess we’ll still rather close? Mm anyway concert itself was fun. I swear I love ‘I wanna hold your hand’ cause it’s so sweet and defining of our choir/friendship bond. It’s a song that will make anyone happy just by listening to it. Even the guy who just had his worst ever day and is falling almost off the surface of the earth with his heart weighing deep down in chest.

Ahh well school work’s going alright. Not exceptionally good and always not on schedule. Guess I need to do something about it.

Ok I just wrote out 648 (and counting) words that you guys are probably only going to see when blogger is available again. :/ but yeah I chose to write it now cause I can search and understand my feelings at this moment. So yeah but have to go to east coast by 7 (wtheck seriously) so I’ll go catch some sleep. Already yawning in front of my computer…

Omg and I swear kev jumba and his dad is seriously damn funny. I laugh whenever I see them. Omg I wish I had a father like that  on a side note… asians rule!!

14thmay: blogger's back so i posted this!

altnative

2011-05-06T22:23:00.002+08:00

something that was bound to happen happened.

shucks i drank half a can of coke, a bottle of sprite (500ml), a macs' cup of ice lemon tea, another half cup (upsized) of macs' coke

oh no i should have controlled my mouth. and my stomach.

and my attitude...

and wth why are the teachers giving us so much homework!!!? ok forget its for O's i should just accept it and do it nice nice. hmpf

one liners

2011-05-05T20:19:00.002+08:00

hi i find this damn funny. hahah

'Do not argue with an idiot. He will drag you down to his level and beat you with experience.'

and this

'Never hold your farts in.

They travel up your spine, into your brain, and that's where you get shitty ideas from.'

ehhehehe sorry i just needed a laugh. i hate it when i google search 'one liner jokes' but all i get are sick ones. *inserts sian face*

man i feel like cuddling a big big bear now. HHAHAHAHA ok........ goodbye while i drown in homework.

but hang on scgs has got no school tomorrow!!! HAHAHA IN YOUR FACE! (just saying you know...)

monopoly

2011-05-01T23:06:00.000+08:00

woohooo! i bought a new edition of monopoly!!! i was so freaking excited that i already began opening it on the bus. omg its damn awesome!! (of course with awesomeness comes money -.-)

to those who don't know, i really really love board games. i prefer them so much to card games or computer games. i find board games so much more fun and just exciting. games like.. monopoly (the classic), game of life, cluedo, break the safe, taboo, dividends and more ^^

heehee ok its the world edition!! and it uses some machine thingy as your bank account. though there's no more cash notes, but omg the machine thing is super cool!! and oh i'm still waiting to see whether they will make a harry potter monopoly edition. ahh please do!!!

ok i shall play monopoly soon, now go study bio first yeah. see you!

revealation and contentment?

2011-04-30T23:31:00.005+08:00

i realised all my posts have been rather, child-like. lol, talking about only the superficial happenings of KYL's life. well, its kinda time for me to be struck by a revealation, which i kind of did on the bus to and fro school.

a few months back, during the new year, i was rather angry, indignant, confused, puzzled, and then was in a total state of well, non-comprehensiveness. because my brother, my cousins and others all spent counting down the new year with their friends. and not their family. i mean, i'm not pointing fingers and expressing my hatred for them, but i was thinking, shouldn't the new year be spent with family?! how does friends come in? i think i'm a rather family-oriented person; i love my family, even though its not perfect, incomplete and everything. (i'm sure that's the same for everyone) and i put my family first, then friends, no doubt. (sorry if that offended anyone) yeah so when all of them were out with their friends at marina, vivo, sentosa blah counting down with their friends and leaving their mothers (my aunts meaning) at the chalet, i was quite angry. ok i need to find another for angry.. its more than angry, its just... i would go as far as saying disappointed. but not at them, at what the society, the youth has become and the habits, the trends and all.

well ok that was my long long story, so in all you just know that i'm this emo self hatred me-against-the-world kinda kid, but recently, or today, i realised that i was being rather insensitive. everybody's entitled to their friends, and their choice. so i guess, i can't really 'force' or compel them to actually stay with their family. and also, i've good friends too, with whom i spent my b'day with first before celebrating it with my mother and brother. so i don't want to be someone who practices double standards and so on. but well, i'm a teenager as well, i'm aware of how big the difference the appeal is celebrating the new year with your friends or family. so i guess, well, i'll be happy for whoever is having fun with their friends. but i'll still be even happier when i see teenagers actually having fun with their mothers/family.

and just to say, i'm not against choosing friends over friends. i'm against choosing friends over fmaily. (well, not that much against now. :/) its different ok!

well, alright despite the past 4 paragraphs, i must clarify that i stillcherish my friends very much!! had a fun time at guides campfire. hhaha we, or at least i, crashed the place. many fun games and stuff, usual lah actually. just some spices in life ^^ spent almost 5h in macs with gwen and amierah and her friends before that. ahh, workload is lessen, but still there. with amath and emath paper 1 and 2, its wishful thinking to hope to finish within the afternoon (unless you're valerie hahaha)

ohhhh yes. standing beside kailin today (for awhile) during choir reminded me of portugal. damn it man, i can't believe how time flew. its almsot a year since we left for spain/portugal. thinking of portugal makes me think of the entire plane rides, the touring, the bus riding, the sleeping on the bus, the preparation for the competition and the competition itself, late night stressing out sessions with the sec 4s, overnight party/talking to sec 4s in one room, squeezing 14 (?) sec 4s into one room, hahaha some night adventure that kailin and i had, eating magnum day in day out, going shopping at every opportunity, snapping pictures, cracking jokes, chatting, just living life without any worry about schoolwork and stuff, and of course i did not forget about kailin whom i spent 12 days/nights with in a room. hahaha no matter how she probably sees me as this big, epic, hopeless loser/goner, still it was a freaking awesome 12 days spent in portugal with the choir and her. sigh kailin you better be reading this some day and be crying tears of sudden overwhelming joy/love. i just feel so happy when i think about portugal. haha and sleeping everywhere.

anyway its late now, imma gonna try rush out my history pt before i sleep. highly impossible but haha, wish me luck man!

2011-04-28T19:45:00.005+08:00

yo guys what's up your brother's back!! muahahaha

well haven't posted in a week and all cause my internet was cut off :( forgot to pay bills so yeah have to pay and wait for them to reactivate it. anyway!

choir got gold with honours!! ok i should stop saying it if not i'll appear like a proud arrogant b****. but yeah when i think of what to write, first thing that came to mind was choir so :/ i know thanks i very loyal. kekeke

well, in this past week that i've been gone, many things have happened! yeap i'm 16 now!!!!! yessssss 16 is an altogether different feeling from 15. when i became 14/15 i felt old, and i didn't want it. but this time! i embraced 16 with all my soul and humanity for i beLIEVE 16 IS THE NEW -

yeah has got nothing to carry on with, but you do notice that i was trying to be all drama and with the increased font size means increased tone and agitation right. yeah 16 means freedom and some sort of liberation. mmm OH THOSE OF YOU GUYS WHO DIDN'T KNOW WAS MY BIRTHDAY: HA! well i thank you in advance for the greetings.

oh sports day on my bday was awesome ^^ number 1 reason: no school! mahahaha and got presents for my 16th year existence ^^ and OMG did i say 4SY won the class cup!!!! (or whatever it is) but aiya, let's face it, everybody knows we won it cause of our sports (vick nut and all) but who cares! we won! yeah i know this is what the winner always say, but then again you've got to be a winner to be able to. ;)

yeah marina barrage after that was damn fun but painful. we just basically decorate ourselves on plates and serve it to the sun's watering mouth. weird metaphor but you get my point. but had tonnes of fun and everything especially with taboo and the ball and the kite and the water. and woohoo met eveline!! so proud for her for her napfa :) heheh everything's going well for her! and she told us some stuff about jc life. in all i guess its just hectic and busy and 1000x more stressful than sec 4 but whatever! by that time i'll be rid of all the hateful subjects and will only be enjoying those that i love :) guess that wouldn't be too stressful. :D

OH i wanted to say something! last wed i was @ bpp and then received a call from zoey. (and zhenyun as well cause they were together) and they were asking about friday blah blah blah and then suddenly we talked about syf. then i told them my choir got gwh and then well, what i heard were just screams of '哇! 哇! 你请客! 请客!' its like a mix of their voices all shouting over the phone and i felt really happy then. like ok nvm if they're actually secretly jealous and hiding a knife over the phone but still, after 4 years of barely meeting each other we can still keep such a close and relax friendship is just so touching!!!! (btw the chinese words means you treat, usually to a meal or sth, you know when sth good happens to somebody) and also instead of the usual scgs way of bursting into tears and congratulating (not that that's a bad thing), they still retained the old, neighbourhood way of i would say expressing their joy for me. HA zoey and zy please don't tell me the truth if i'm actually deceiving myself. yeah but anyway congrats to your gold as well!!

ok yeah i dont wanna make my post too long and boring so i'll end here. i'll try to post some pictures from sports day/marina barrage next post. probably ripped from steph's/kirsten's/gwen's facebook albums. hahahah but knowing me i probably won't ever get down to do it. but before i leave, HARRY POTTER AND THE DEATHLY HALLOWS PART 2 TRAILER IS OUT!!!!! PLEASE WATCH! ITS FREAKING EPIC.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=hcf6cwr9TnY

edit: oh on second thought, since this is such a long post, i'll end with a picture related to the last post. well, a picture or two ;)

syf'11. < 3 think we pretty much made history on that day ^^

sec 4s. < 3 always there and always unique and always the love. ^^ i'm so glad to be born in 1995.

GUESS WHAT.

2011-04-18T23:08:00.009+08:00

EAT SHIT IN YOUR FACE WE WIN LIKE HELL #92 SINGAPORE CHINESE GIRLS' SCHOOL GOLD WITH HONOURS. YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS HELL TO THE YES.

SCHOIR 2011 JUST FREAKING MADE HISTORY.

i'll never ever forget that feeling of euphoria and just overwhelming joy, gratitude, surprise, victory i felt, or we felt, when the announcer said gold with honours. its something magical that really happens once in a thousand lifetimes and heck, probably the last time if 2012's to come true. its something definitely worth sarcrificing anything for (including amath test tmr). and to just share the same feeling with 70++ people out of 6billion in the world is just amazing.

its like being part of something so exclusive and something so special that no one would probably understand the bond from outside.

well i don't wanna go into this huge tirade and philosophical learnings that we've taken from this syf. i know this is probably just read by a very minority of the choir, but i just wanna really thank SC CHOIR for allowing me to be part of them, and be part of this experience that only WE will share, only we, the 2011 batch will fully have to our name. and then even more i really wanna thank the sec 4s who are just pure, amazing people that made my whole choir journey like one hell of a freaking ride. (omg why does it sound like a farewell post). without the batch of sec 4s, my whole choir life would definitely be less fun, more boring, more dead, and of course, less love. so yeap, people born in 1995 (and 1994) in choir today are the people who made me love choir so much. so yes love you and choir.

i know i don't cry much but i laugh as much as people cry when we got GWH. so my love for you guys cannot be doubted ok.

2011-04-17T22:22:00.002+08:00

let us be celebrating 20 hours from now.

what a week!

2011-04-16T21:55:00.004+08:00

woohoo! looks like reception is pretty good ^^ setting up my cbox at 8 this morning and having a few comments already without much shameless advertising!! ^^ hehehhe thanks guys!!! i shall reply you there ok. :D

many things to talk about this time! i mean, you've seen my title. though i didn't go sky diving, bungee jumping, cliff leaping, cockroach eating, worms appreciating, bieber watching (?!?!) etc etc i can sum up that this week has been pretty much a week.

first! last 3 choir pracs. oh hell man well they're definitely the best practices ever but i still feel kinda unprepared for monday. today was best though, especially the take with LAN there. i could really feel it!! it was like the take before we went for syf 09 in the music room. but ahh HHH was not good :( anywayy no more practices left. well, save the philosophical, SCHOIR is a seed which blossomed in &$^%$#@%$ harsh conditions into a seed speech. let's just shut up but get a gold with honours on monday!!!!!!!!!!! (ahh chill chill breathe no adrenaline allowed)

bio test was fine. i actually spent only about 3-4 hours to finish memorising what's needed. so thank god not alot of content came out? oral on wednesday was so sucky. got miss choo who kept looking around :( and she prompted me three times for conversation!! heck man there goes my prelim orals. oh physics wasn't as bad as it was spreading around. didn't do exceptionally well, but hopefully can maintain the standard lah. ya anyway i think this week's the most draining week ever lah. i was so glad on thursday when physics test ended. im kinda hecking amath test this tues... hopefully mrs chan won't be too mad at me :/

ok boring part over!! (sorry i'm one who has to write out about what i did. sorry if it bores you)

YAY OK IM DAMN PROUD THAT I MANAGED TO WARD OFF AND KEEP THOSE TEMPTATIONS when i went to jess gun's bday party yesterday! OMG there was like a million bags of chips + cold drinks + god knows what that can destroy one's throat. i only ate chicken wings!! ok lah, heaty and oily but i drank alot of water!! omg it was freaking fun even though most of the time was spent fanning the charcoal and playing monopoly/game of life/twister. hahaha we had like about an hour of b****ing session about people. hahahah and OH speaking of JGUN i finally found your present JGUN!!! yours and sam... after like 3/4 hours of roaming around bugis!!! argh if you're reading this its not only for cause i feel obliged but seriously since you're leaving.. i might as well give you a farewell gift too right. EH JGUN ARE YOU READING THIS. (i bet she forgot about the url i wrote for her) hahaha I WILL MISS YOU IN BIO CLASS :(

oh and jgun makes me see how beautiful a person can be when she has a damn good friend. hahahah ok what was that. ok wait, you see, during amath lesson i saw jgun writing furiously over her fullscrap pad. and me, thinking that she had all her brain power and mass on amath, thought wow good job jess. but then, afterwards i saw her smiling to herself and i'm like ... ... right.. she can't possibly be doing amath. (well apart from perhaps valerie i don't see anyone who actually deprives happiness from amath) and mind you her smile was like from ear to ear, practically gonna burst out from her face. and oh she looked so radiant and shiny and almost an ambassador for the new SKII product! wa phew man her face was all red and i discovered that she was actually writing a letter to huifen. awww the beauty and art of friendship. right in front of me in that instant was just a beautiful, almost angelic, sacred portrayal of the bond of friendship and oh, the love! hahaha what an inspiration! its really nice to do that once in a while, so you know at least you have a damn good friend with you. ^^

OMGGGGGGGG AND MRS CHAN WAS DAMN FUNNY ON FRIDAY DURING AMATH. and ok its damn rare for her to be so jovial ok, usually in remedial she's like *&%&^#^%$#^&^ WHY NEVEER BRING YOUR PROTRACTOR!!! so well, somebody asked to go to the toilet and she jokingly says "why everytime amath must go toilet ah, my face look like toilet izzit" LOLLLLLLLLLLLLL i think i was laughing damn loudly. like hahahhahahahahha OK YEAH.

next. another joke i have from bio with jgun!! we were learning about the different number of chromosomes different animals have. (basically you can only have offspring with someone who have the same number of chromosomes as you) hahah and it so happens that a goat and buffalo has 60 each. so we were imagining a goaffalo and how they actually started asking each other out. or i was...

(let's just say the buffalo's a male and goat's a female)
buffalo: "mooo mooo moooooooooo" *snorts snorts*
goat: "maeyy maeyy maeyyyy maeyyyyyyyy!!!" hahahahhaha then omg the goat will have ribbons on her small horns on her head. HAHAHAH ok yeah. and another takeaway's that if you call someone a hog, you're basically saying she's made up of a horse and a dog. hahahaha

running away with so many things to say

2011-04-07T22:51:00.011+08:00

right i have so much to say. there were overloading thoughts around my head today during my bath. :(

1. today's choir was definitely a productive one, what with putting together all our mistakes and then trying to retify them. but it feels like.. 4 practices left, we shouldn't be still like making mistakes, we should already be perfecting our music to a gwh level. that being said, i feel like i have not been contributing well :( mrs goh says i sing with my front voice :( oh heck now how!! i'm a sec 4 and it will be serious outright blatantly (wow that's 3 words to emphasise my point) lying if i say i wasn't affected. that's why you see this as number 1 on today's post. anyway, i am confused, i sang with the same voice that mrs goh said was back voice the previous time!! but regardless, since it sounded better after removing all the front voices, i guess what i can do now is not to come up with excuses but just try to clear up my problems with singing. ahh crap...

2. tomorrow's basically one of those fridays which i dread. its those fridays where i go home to just study and study more, instead of resting and relaxing after a whole week of torture. sure lah, this week slack, but you know, friday is friday. there's nothing you can do to change the usual feeling a person has to friday. i'll probably be mugging through the weekend continuously, alternating between bio and physics (thank god i don't have geog!) plus i'm not doing well in my studies either. :( and for all for those you who thinks that that meant not getting 80+ or 90+, well, no. its so much worse than that. ok so choir and studies. well i will not be knocked over!!! screw it man. ok nvm, i shall just end this by swearing, swearing that i will do the best that i can be. (wooo!! zhenghua's motto!) which brings me to sth else... the AC family has the motto the best is yet to be. i don't understand. yet to be... yet to be... wth you waiting for?!

3. ok next. i hate it that whenever i'm feeling low, i feel like punching myself whenever i look into the mirror. this is not some... metaphorical or some badass eng pro way to describe my feelings, i seriously got the physical urge to punch the mirror. shit i'm scaring myself. and i hate it whenever i feel happy, i feel like i see a goddess in the mirror. which is freaking hilarious if you think about it.

4. returning back to choir, this time in a positive light ^^. i really really love it when the altos sing yomobete blah blah on their own. you know after 4 of sop2s freaking ass hard difficult as hell can kill bridge. i feel so touched whenever i hear that. its like i can feel the bond of the choir from their low deep and kinda meanacing voices. and then looking over, i see belinda's face all crunched up and serious and just in her own way 'passionate', i feel it even more. and then i'm reminded again of the fact that choir is not only about mechanics and techicalities, its so much more than that. its about friends, love for singing, and then loving each other. those, are the most important thing i will take away from being in SC choir i'm sure. today kailin asked why i chose to join choir. my answer was... a lame shrug and just a statement of "i was in primary sch choir". well, that's true, and if you think about it i really have no more talents to fit into other ccas, but i guess one huge reason why is because i love singing and more imptly, this unique, rare, seriously will get me over the moon bond i get in choir, which i often get when the altos start that yomobete. (there kailin, if you're reading this, your deep philosophical answer. hahaha, i guess i would pale in comparison to that taiwanese but ahh well only for this time)

5. jumping over to a completely different topic... if a kid has lost her father (let's just use a young girl ok win more sympathy), whether is it to like death or the father just left with other woman or some other tv dramas reasons, would it be the same if her mum remarries and the new guy take the place of the father? i'm asking you guys too, but i'm thinking no. i mean, a biological one and a well.. 'fake' one (im sorry new guy) can't be any same right? there must be a different feeling... a more home-y feeling right? if i were the kid, i don't think i would ever want a new one. i'd rather live forever without one, even though every time i pass by a toddler calling 'daddy' there would be probably be this tug at the heart, and then looking at the daddy for a second longer, wondering what would my life be like if he was my father instead. yahdah yahdah, probably the usuals, but i guess if you're not in the situation you'll never sorta understand right? just sth that came up from my synapses joining at an angle too wide...

6. what do you call running away from your problems? because i find myself not wanting to remember things that are wrong, things that causes humiliation. lol, in a bad way of course. well my theory's that as long as i 'learn' what can be learnt from that incident then its not considered as running away right?! i mean wth does running away from your problems really mean? whenever i think of something that isn't really good for my image (that's just a formal way to put it), i just refuse to think about it. is that normal?!?! of course i'm not talking about those times where i did some embarrassing things out of accident (eg. bus falling, looking like a freaking sotong etc) and my friends and i have a laugh about it, but other more.. sensitive, judgemental times.

AIYAH forget it. i think i just bore everyone out with this post. sorry deborah you didn't get a stress relief from this. oh and i just used some time that could be used for bio for this.. but ok nvm at least i kept a record of my 15 year old thoughts...

OK see ya will be mugging like a worm for physics and bio so you might not see me for awhile!

I SPENT SO LONG FORMATTING THIS THING CAUSE THE WORDS WON'T BUDGE AND WHEN I PRESS ENTER IT DOESN'T SHOW A LINE :(

APRIL

2011-04-04T19:52:00.004+08:00

its april, april, gotta get down in april!!

YES! the 4th month of the year has finally arrived! april's the best month of the year! though it can be too hot at times, but sometimes i feel april is where all the nice things happen, and when all the nice and awesome people are born ^^

many many birthdays in april so happy birthday to all april babies yo ^^ can't wait for sports day muhahaha and oooh april starts with A like august, which happens to be the month rupert grint was born in!!!!

ohkay yaw i just took a chill pill. cool down. this is weird, i dunno what to say liao. i came on blogger with many things on my mind, but now i just can't think of any...

ok nvm i think i would log off now. OH WAIT I CAN'T 1ST POST IN APRIL CANNOT BE A MEANINGLESS POST.

(continued on 5th april from yesterday)

yay ok my blogpost is full of meaning now!!

i still can't get down to the fact that there's officially only 5 practices left to syf!! its too freaking fast!! urgh and our ksn is still .... shaky. ok nvm hopefully next 5 pracs will be over the top kind and we'll nail it in!

(ok im looking at the pictures now and i think they're really out of place! but no deleting, i waited for them to be uploaded until i fell aslp!! cannot let my efforts (or my computer's) go to waste)

eh class cheer tomorrow!! let 4sy break the house downnnnnn!!! screw it if we're not good/familiar with the moves, the volume is what matters ^^ (ok i'll speak loudly, i won't shout.)

OMG I FOUND STH TO SAY! you know i really like youtube entertainers. like those who made parodies/just weird/funny. people like fred, ryan niagahaha (or however you spell his name), kev jumba dad-son pair and many many more. they're seriously damn hilarious and i actually laugh like mad in front of the laptop until my mum looks over. ya eh can go check them out.

oh and bpp was talking about going for kung fu panda. its coming out may 26th guys!!! (im assuming you guys are reading this...) oh is that near someone's birthday? ^^ ok nvm yay po i can't wait to see po again! and gary oldman (sirius black) is voicing some bad dude inside!

just for fun...

HAHHAHAHAHAHHA OMG MY TV IS PLAYING AND ITS SHOWING THE TWO OF US AND ITS SO FUNNY!!

(agitated young woman screaming) "how dare you? is there anything else you can say other than how dare you?!?!?!"

(older woman hollering)"GET OUT GET OUT!! GET OUT NOW!!!"

HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHA OMGGG

....

and oh on a more mature note my mother thinks i don't love her!!!! how the heck did that happen?! i thought all parents know that their kids love them. ok maybe i don't say i love you to her every morning... but i mean it should be quite clear right?! maybe sometimes i'm disrepectful... angry... fight with her but still! ok nvm... i'll try to say i love you to her sometime... after i pluck up the courage.

ok fine this post is so damn long. i'm gonna end here. oh and this post is dedicated to deborah koh. hopefully you laughed at my jokes! (or attempts at joking....)

hmmm

2011-03-31T21:22:00.005+08:00

actually i think rebecca black's is not a very bad singer. i mean, firstly you've got to admit her 'friday' is freaking catchy and the fact that she's earning more than a million from iTunes downloads/people buying her one and only song must mean something! and oh my freak, she's 14! poor her pitiful soul when everybody critises her outstandingly bad singing. lol, but she can actually sing when you look at the video of her singing an excerpt from US's national anthem. well.. good luck to her career but for now i shall reserve more luck for myself ^^ SYF gwh seem so possible. i mean, if everyone, every single one, just deliver her most perfect performance on stage, i'm pretty sure we will emerge victorious . like everybody has their own mental note of where's their own problems and etc etc and then obviously don't make them during syf performance. so yeah.. good luck and let SC choir rock it out :) hopefully the juniors are motivated from the sec 4s talk today. 18 more days!! and omg i really really really love ksn now. whenever the song starts i feel freaking excited. like omg pumping. but when HHH comes its like... not boring, but let's just say its the song that i dislike most among the 3. yeah. yay omg physics test is over! plus next week not many tests!!! ^^ oh and hopefully 4SY will surprise everybody and do freaking well for class cheer on wed. he-he-he, as belinda said, we can be the black horse!! AND OMG speaking of belinda, i found out sth!! sarah and kailin read my blog!!! wooohooo! 2 more readers!!! ^^ yay! maybe i should get down to putting a chatbox/comment page soon. but what if no one comments :( then i'll appear like a... i dunno. ok fine nvm the most i'll pose myself as maria and say something nice.

2011-03-23T18:01:00.003+08:00

i ran today. despite promising myself never ever to again. (oh and guess what! 10 round race is tomorrow!)

damn shit seriously. i only run cause its healthy. thats all. all in the name of health. (but ok lah fine health is damn impt) its not for dieting. recently i've found myself getting less healthy. i don't know how you judge the level of healthiness in one person without medi kit and all that, but ya i just don't feel healthy. i don't shit well :( i get constipation. and every time after i pee i feel like there are bubbles popping in my stomach. its like (di yi sheng) 'zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz puck!' you get what i mean?!

ya that's that. but i'm still quite happy. i ran more and walked less as compared to the previous 2 times!

but on a more negative note, choir prac today was so lousy and demoralising. meaning of lousy means, i went out feeling lousy, not the quality/tonality/standards of our voice. fine, our standard still suck anyway. we worked on expressions (which was rather ineffective in reality cause everybody was smiling only because of the awkwardness of the outer moving circle and because seniors were watching them -.-) and then listening to sec 1/2/newcomers sing was ok... i mean, its not damn damn good (of course i don't expect like GWH x10 standards, but still... ) i think sop 2s are fine, notes and all, its just the tone that needs to be work on now. ok fine i shall stop i feel like i'm offending the entire choir. but its damn worrying!! but nevertheless, can really see that all of them tried their best (really), just the cow away a little, probably because of their fear for seniors.

3-4 weeks to show, i think SC CHOIR should really be motivated EVERY session and make every session a freaking good one. and probably because this's the last year i (and all others in sec 4) want to really end the year with a blast. in other words, gold with freaking honours.

ok so stress's getting everybody fuzzy and drowning now, so i shall post pictures to brighten up my blog :) well my idea is that your eyes won't get stressed as well from all the words...

this is rain. in case it appears incomprehensible... rain's probably one of my favourite things in the world. like top 3. i specially love heavy heavy downpours (with piercing lightning and eath shattering thunders) when you're inside your house, and its all dark, and you're probably watching harry potter and the order of the pheonix. ^^ its this warm, ahhh feeling inside like you need not worry about anything in the world. or in the bus on the expressway. when its raining and flooding and the bus is freaking dark. i feel cosy and loved ^

i discovered my liking for lion dance only recently. like when a lion dance troupe came into school for chinese new year. i find the drums and the clangs and just the bg music really exciting. i mean, literally it is. but to me its like woah live and its very happy you know. there's not a single dis-se-nuns (that fancy italian music word which is uaully liken to a hanging/sad chord) yeah..

THIS is seriously the BEST chocolate ever. the very best. the finest. i mean, its not like 200 dollars per piece of anything, but its seriously the nicest chocolate i've ever eaten. like the outside is damn smooooth, and when you bite, the chocolatey taste just overwhelms your mouth and the layers of biscuits simply just a medium that help spread the chocolate evenly throughout your mouth. (ok poor attempt at trying to get readers to salivate but you get my point)

i definitely love singing. like especially in groups, when we sing acapella. so that's why i really love/cherish times singing with the sec 4 level. singing in an acapella group as a career is still one of my options at occupations in life. ^^ i just love the bond between singers and how we feel the same thing/gather together for the same thing. so yeah SC CHOIR!!!!

(spot me!!!!!)

family gatherings. even though alot of people don't turn up (overseas, busy, working, lazy etc etc) i enjoy famiy gatherings alot. i don't wanna elaborate much lah, but in short its like i don't find family gatherings a chore and i really like visiting my grandma even though she doesn't understand me and pretty much vice versa. :))

ok i think this is the lamest post i've ever done. it feels like i'm doing a freaking self-introduction. i have a strong urge to delete all the pictures and captions that i just wrote, but i will not because i don't want my efforts and time to go to waste. ok ya bye

choir camp

2011-03-19T12:02:00.004+08:00

i guess, in terms of the very very last choir camp in sc i'll have, this is certainly not what i would want. but, in terms of singing skills, preparations for SYF, then i guess this camp is the most productive one i've gone to.

practice was tough (sometimes draining) and some other musical/mini choirs group activities were fun too. mini choir whatever was scary. i couldn't even get the first F throughout the practice! i think my ears were playing and insisting on its own tune :( but performance was ok, except for some slow stupid part.

choir camp has no games :( why?! sometimes it won't hurt to have games right :( i really wanted to play charades/pictionary!! or even splat or any lame games. we actually had homework time instead, which was taken surprisingly seriously. i think mrs yogee must have exerted her authority and make everyone shut up.

macs was definitely fun :) shaker fries ftw man! its the nicest thing macdonalds have, apart from mcflurry. ^^ watching burlesque was an okay choice. (lack in storyplot!!) yeah and then we sleep ^^ i would have love for the whole level to stay up to talk till dawn but nevermind. these things seldom happen, and when they do, its best if its a spur of the moment thing.

ok so i guess bonding is just the same?! i might be able to recognise/name some of the sec 1 juniors now though. hahah we had a sop 2 talk, think its quite effective lah. sop 2s rocks btw ^^ hehhehehe we're the funnest and best section ever. ok, i'm talking in really short sentences. oh and i have (or should i say 'habour'? sounds damn phido) affectionate feelings for some people in choir ^^ affectionate meaning affection, and not love/relationship/husbandandwife/SCANDALS. (oh and amierah was cheating on me with some jack guy throughout burlesque)

ok. the end. imma gonna sleep naw. (note the attempts to sound 'cool') seeeeayah guys sooon.

oh enjoy the last 2 days of holidays guys! especially those born in '95 cause the remaining... 8 months gonna be a hell of a ride.

oh andddddddd i can't wait for sports day!!! no test + sports day (cheering slacking blah) + birthday + after syf (hopefully still at the 3/50th day of celebrations for GWH) + birthday + gwen's birthday + going out with gwen and probably others = BRING IT ON.

tired.

2011-03-11T18:58:00.004+08:00

but then again, who's not these days anyway?

there are times after school, i just feel so damn tired. the propsect of trudging me and my bag home is totally more than sian-ness. its horrible actually. these are the times where i hope and pray and wish and hope and pray then i actually have a chaueffeur, or a parent who can fetch me to and fro school. today was one of the days. after bio mcq test i went to the canteen to have food. and even though i was with 3 others, i felt totally burnt out. not from studying, but just burnt out from working. working day to night, going home, going school. kim, zhimun and zing chatted for awhile after the food, but i was feeling damn tired. i even called my mum to confirm that i have to take a bus home even though i clearly know that i have to. i wished to simply lie on the bench and sleep. i felt like i could just go into non-existence within 10 seconds of closing my eyes. before that, i would like it to lie on a friend's lap and just cuddle up into nothingness. but i can't. i had to work my slow way home and only songs could have gotten me through the awful, torturous 18 minute bus ride.

i hope i don't come out too pampered, cause i'm not (hopefully). but i often wonder what it'll be like i came out with a million dollars in my mother's womb. definitely i'll be living a much wonderful, comfortable life. i would be able to pay for my own school fees, so my mum is free to enjoy herself. i would definitely be living in more comforts now. well, probably. i would not consider my family particularly rich. i guess we're just averagey you know. living in HDB. 20-30 bucks for pocket money per week. but yeah, i have no complains. (ok that was abrupt)

ok ya term 1's over and everything. hope everything goes more smoothly next term and next next term and next next next term. i guess i'll blog more sometime later. am really tired now.

have a nice holiday guys!

2011-03-01T20:19:00.004+08:00

omg this is seriously the best best best thing ever. seriouslllllly. please watch it!!!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0PXaZdqyEAM&feature=feedu

well to all who watch DHpart1 this is sth about it. rmb ron's speech when he came back? yeah this is the singing version of it. OMG ITS REALLY THE BEST EVER. its so epic!!! not sure whether is it just computer generated or he really recorded it. if so OMG RUPERT GRINT YOU HAVE A DAMN NICE VOICE. ok they say its autotune. so what does that mean?

2011-02-23T18:10:00.002+08:00

hi so sorry my london blogskin was screwed so i changed it to this customised thingy. which sucks. i've been attempting to change to sth nicer/change back to the london one but i can't seem to do it. so for now, sorry this has to be it! and my tagboard and everything else is gone!!! i did not save my old template!! oh man.

2011-02-23T02:13:00.004+08:00

hi guys!!

no worries, even though its 2am now, i've slept for about 6 hours :) am going back to bed later, probably after i go through the bio spa slides first :D anyway thanks for all the encouragement!! yay i'm better now!! namely because amath and emath tests are over... but still! let me reply you guys here... cause yeah, its easier :)

-currently craving for macs fries ahh-

zing: thanks for the mum comment :) it means alot my mum really think that. i'll be so happy ^^ its true i think my mother doesn't want me to be stressful. she always say try your best and its enough; but the problem is that although i study alot, i don't feel like i tried at all :( and hahaha once again, nope the friend comment isn't about you, i think you're somewhere more than that to me...

brenda: haha brandy nice metaphor. sinking -.- at least you don't fail your tests what.. you're still okay! heheh we can work hard together :D (only sometimes i lose the motivation due to several reasons like distractions... eg. my thoughts hahhahaa) yes i really think its not the grades that count, but the fact is our society kinda takes that into account alot... unlike other countries. sigh, so this is the threat! increasing competition within local students!! so sad..

-ahh my neighbour's playing mahjong now. can hear!!! its 2am!-

yanru: :D yes!! i know when i put in my best it'll be good!! so i'm going to try to find a way where i can squeeze out my 100% concentration and 10000000000% motivation to study for O's ^^ heheh thanks for always helping me in class :) and turning back to chat. haha yes i will keep smiling and singing!!! (hopefully anu isn't that irritated at me hahaha)

kiran: hello makawana! happy birthday! :) sorry i really don't get your blog!! you write such deep and... descriptive stuff, using words i probably have never ever seen... haha but still i constantly check your blog to see whether you wrote any 'sane' or readable (in my context lah) stuff. hahah yay hopefully my blog will continue to keep you smiling. hahaha i like making pple laugh (not at me though hahaha, though i think that's always the case!) ok i'll go check out robbie william's song now.. btw just a passing remark, rupert grint met robbie williams before!

OMG KIRAN THIS IS CHILDHOOD SONG!!! I HEARD THIS SO MANY TIMES WHEN I WAS YOUNG!! THANKSSSSSSS :D I LOVE REVISITING CHILDHOOD SONGS, i find them really really nice and pure as compared to today's music... that's why i like westlife and backstreet boys. hahah all the oldies.. not really, yeah, but still. thanks ah!!! woo!!

"if there's somebody, calling me out, she's the one"~ wa the tune is so so nice. and you guys should go check it out if you're free. ^^

ok omg i wanna talk about normal things but the song is still playing in my ears, literally lah. ok omg my fitness is damn bad did i ever tell you! on saturday i was nearby playing with mow kailin and chan and mow's 2 brothers. and i got so tired easily. and we were only playing catching!!! gosh, i only have to run after 2 kids and 3 same age pple and i was sweating literally like a pig. how to survive 2.4?! need to go train soon... but on the same matter, sat was really fun!!! hahaa even though kailin laughed at me alot but omg we should do that like next month!! again! and other pple reading this you want we can go play catching together once during recess or when we meet up :) hehehe ^^

(omg kiran we should do the song acapella one day with our lvl, with solos at different parts, then the rest can provide the harmony!!! omg it will be so touching!! sorry the song's still playing)

ok let's see do i have anything else to talk about... not really. but O's aside, i'm just really happy recently. saturday's catching have reduced me to almost a 5 year old again which i'm glad of ^^. and well everything's going on rather smoothly.. so now its just working on my grades! no worries i'm taking a rather positive attitude here so :)

oh and my mum told me something when i was stressing over emath/amath over the weekends. she literally said this '人比人比不完'. in eng it just means you'll never finish comparing yourself to others. ok lah sth like that la, eh kiran you can come in now :) yeah, so i was amazed at how this statement seem so familiar yet so unfamiliar to me. i guess all my life (b4 sec 3 probably) i've been happy, not really comparing pple and putting myself down. but in sec 3 and sec 4, i realised i've been doing more and more of that. and yet, stored up in some tiny tiny corner of my brain i know of this quote, probably even live by it, but i guess i was just blinded and became delusioned with trying to improve my grades that i unconsciously keep on putting myself on others' lvl. probably thus, causing me all the stress. and when my mother said this, i felt like it was such a revelation to me; she dug out from the tiny corner of my brain kinda the key to being happy and just, being yourself. so of course, i was really comforted by that, which actually inspired me to work harder. so im really thankful to my mum, even though she probably see it as a passing remark...

haha im sorry im such a bore! my posts are all about academics. well ok anyway... so if any of you guys are currently in that lvl where you're just stuck and within your own world of grades and comparing and trying to be on par, just try taking a seat back and maybe your results will actually get better :) like what i'm trying to do now.. so yeap.

ok its near 2.50. i think i best go sleep now. haha sorry for the lengthiness of this post!

ps: kiran... i practically raped the repeat button on youtube through the course of typing this blog... ahhh what a nice song!!

2011-02-12T17:53:00.003+08:00

today, i realised that all the pressure that i have come from my teachers, and then, me. my mother doesn't give me any stress at all. she told me straight up today. even though i've got knowledge of that fact quite awhile ago, it only took me until today to connect the dots and realise that i'm the cause of my stress. and certain teachers. but let's not talk about that first.

my mum doesn't scold, berate, hate me or whatsoever when i do badly for a test. or when i stopped receiving edusave bursary awards or whatever that thing is. but i know, when i do badly, there must be a small inkling of disappointment in her, and probably fear at perhaps 2005 repeating itself, only this time with a different child. i have a very close relationship with my mum, and i take pride in that. sometimes i make her angry, sometimes she makes me angry, but beyond it all, i still love her alot. i think we have a strong dependence on each other, so, as the years pass, i sort of developed this mindset that i must do well because i want to make her proud of me. proud that she has a daughter like that. i'm not trying to paint myself as a O holy what good hearted and respectful angel - i wouldn't fake things up, not when my mum, or my family is concerned.

so this year and last year, when my grades sorta fell, i felt sad, not for my results, but because i failed in letting my mum be happy. again, i'm not trying to act like such a noble person, but our mother-daughter r'ship is just different. she may not want me to stress myself up so as to get good grades just for her, but believe me, without this faith i'll probably be hanging out with gangsters now and almost going out every other day, and then, who cares about academics.

then, stress from the teachers. jess gun (yay she loves hearing this name) says that its scary, because your perception of a subject is largely based on a teacher. and i agree. i would probably be scared of bio if mdm goh was taking it. but no, i'm not scaed of bio because mrs mohan and mrs cha are really nice people. so whether or not you want to study for the test also depends on the teacher, for if you fear that teacher, then, you will study. just like for physics and etc. teachers' expectations are quite scary, especially in my class. and everybody is doing so well, which increases the teachers' expectations, and the poor ones must keep trying. its a vicious cycle , which i think, isn't really necessary at times. but also essential to push me, and other studuents to the academical limit. ahh well

so there. the end of my long post. sorry it wasn't perfect and so philosophical like kiran's. (omg do you read her blog!!! its quite scary! i don't understand what she's saying!! and kiran if you're reading this, i don't mean your posts are not good, its just incomprehensible to a person like me who only knows rupert grint and harry potter. haha) i wanted to blog about sth else, but i guess i'm done with today. so ya! see you guys soon.......................

to a friend that i know but well, not really know: sometimes i wish we were really really good friends. i'll really cherish our friendship if that happens. but its really hard to start when we don't even have anything in common, or to share. so ahh well, i'll carry on hoping.

ahh, my blog is damn pathetic.

ran by a pretty pathetic arse too.

ahh well bye!

2011-02-04T16:12:00.003+08:00

so, HAPPY CHINESE NEW YEAR!!!

to kim, i wanted to blog this cny hols!! hahah didn't know you were following so faithfully ;')

and to zy, yeah we should meet up this holiday :) i just asked you on facebook! doubt you've seen it though.

and ok this blog shadn't be about tests. .... ... but OMG I JUST REMEMBERED THERE'S PHYSICS TEST ON THURS!!! AND ITS GONNA BE A KILLER TEST! ... ... ok nvm.

anyway, i think this is the best cover of 'the climb' i've ever heard. its even better miley cryus!! not that she's good to begin with. but this youtube group is really good!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CFSI9X6R1sE

they make every song sound so touching!!

anyway happy chinese new year! its the year of the rabbit, so tu fei meng jin (yes i copied this from the tv, celebrities whatever!) to everyone! in terms of studies and for those working! hopefully there's gonna be a payrise for all adults and a vast improvement in academic grades for us youths!! and to all, especially the more senior ones, please stay healthy cause health is the most impt of all :) life is fragile, and illnesses are prone, so take care!! drink water and stay really healthly psychologically as well :) to all sec 4 friends, we shall work together to conquer the O's!!

and hopefully all of you guys got really really massive angbaos ^^

anyway 2011's cny for me was better ^^ better than xmas and the eng new year lah. had more fun and got on better terms with some cousins. its not like we were fighting then, but just, you know!

ok i haven't touched my homework (bad yiling!) but i've done at least about half the preparation i need for history test. (sry its about test again) you know how long it takes to prepare for a history essay! and we need 3 ok! anyway, did it with deborah so yay! work load split half!

ok i really have nothing to say liao. sry this post is a let down. but when i find my revelation in life and whatever, you shall be the first one to know it ok! :D hahaha

2011-01-22T21:52:00.002+08:00

damn damn damn i'm failing physics!

and there's another one this thursday! omg, can't afford to fail anymore. if not mdm goh will explode on me.

sometimes i really wish that i was born in another country. hawaii for example. or some other western countries where life can be so laid back and relaxed and people just don't hate. and education isn't everything. really, the only thing about singapore that sucks to the max is its focus on the education system. we don't feel it, cause we're already in it. since young. we think this is the norm. we think doing well in grades and doing well in assignments is the norm. i feel almost as if we've been brainwashed and singapore is almost using its youths to 'nurture' into 'useful', 'contributing' adults. hell. what a life i have had. just studies and more studies. sometimes i just don't understand why must our country be like that. or why must our teachers be so ^%#^%$#@ about our studies. high expectations really cause unnecessary stress. seriously. 无形的压力. i learnt that during chinese compo test on friday. see, test again! but in any case, i'm still glad that sometimes i take a back seat and just be happy for the simplest things there can ever be. (this sentence is quite awkward in the paragraph)

i find myself looking more and more forward to uni life. where, i heard, that everything is much relaxing. plus i can take the subjects i really like. no more learning about things that i find neutral or simply uninteresting and dead. no more math, no more science (for now.) i know JC life will be hard and A's gonna be so much worse than O's. so i'm trying to enjoy everything i can now. including choir, though we're really trudging through this muddy slow process now. (but hopefully we'll reach this 'paradise of flowers' when SYF comes! haha)

its only 22 days into 2011. but i kinda find that i spent more effort/have more time to be a good friend this year as compared to others. ironically, its the year where i'm supposed to be the busiest, but i look forward to class bonding through sharing the same mountain pile of homework and just stressing out together. ahh, enough of that.

i realise that really, the longer you not see someone, the stronger you feel you missed him when you see him again. just last last friday, i walk into bio prac and saw mr sim. suddenly i was overwhelmed with this.. affection and admiration for that man standing right in my view. i really miss him teaching me bio. maybe its just he gives off the real fatherly vibes, to make me feel so 'attracted'. i've noticed i liked any uncle who's nice (with a nice face) and gives off a very fatherly and loving vibe. ahh well. i think fathers are really nice men. mothers are just noble. anyway i saw mdm kwek on thursday too in the canteen. and i missed her :(( i wanted to say hi but she was talking to miss ku. so arghh

another thing. ever since last year, i kinda realised that i want a lot of children next time. like more than average. so that my home can be lively and fun and loving. now, i discover that many teens (including my bro) rather spend time with friends than family during xmas or new year. which is quite sad. and makes me very angry as well. i just can't comprehend why they do it. i mean, xmas and new year (and other occasions) are for family gatherings and hang outs right?! yeah, so next time, i'll really marry a rich man, and hopefully he loves kids, and then we'll have a happy family. and nobody will be lonely anymore, ever.

anyway on friday when i was going home alone, i somehow mistook the 700 bus for 190. so i took it and ended up spending 5 more mins before i can get down the bus. i don't understand!! this is the 3rd time!! (previous 2 times i mistook 190 for 960) its quite irritating really. im not glad im 'blur' really. grrr

oh and i find myself actually being quite awkward. i will seriously smile/laugh to myself (ok that's not awkward) when i look at texts or think of something while crossing the road. i don't mind being alone, but sometimes really find being with someone else quite awkward. like i think my conversation topics are damn lousy. i can't crack a joke or a one liner that can make pple laugh instantly and just love me. ahh well.

anyway yes end of blogpost. nothing to blog about already. so i guess its a see you then! tmr is study physics day~ say yay! ...

2011-01-15T18:31:00.003+08:00

good things and bad things this week!

1. A1 for chinese O's!!!! woohoo!! and distinction oral. weee! i wasn't as excited/overjoyed as i thought i would be. i guess if i receiveed the results last last week when i was panicking then i probably can even cry tears of joy. hahah i think i've accepted the fact that no matter what, you can't change the results anymore. so i was only a tinny winny bit nervous and scared. but no matter what! A1 is certainly a good sign!! and i really want to carry on with a string of A1s :) and by string i mean at least 7.....

2. i said walao when mdm goh was next to me! oh no man seriously!!! she's gonna get a super bad impression of me and view me as some neighbourhood gangster...

3. physics test. i really studied damn hard for this test ok. but it was hard. i mean, it wasn't as hard as i thought, but i made mistakes. a lot. and the concepts i'm supposed to know just ran out of my mind. especially dynamics. omg seriously i hope i don't fail!!! i don't wanna fail the 1st test of the year!!! and my teacher is mdm goh (see no. 2)

4. i must be the biggest joke ever. you see, today i was trying to study chem in my room. and after 2 hours, i only had the sequence of the reactivity series in my mind. so i decided 'oh let's go to the park to study!' and i did. so i brought my chem book, handphone, keys, a pack of sweets, water bottle and tissue paper (yes its like moving house and i feel like an auntie). but not even 3 minutes after sitting down at the park bench, my hands and legs started itching. i haven't even open the book! many insects were on my body.. and around me. and i was sitting on a bench below a tree. so i kept imagining that a snake would come down and strangle me or sth. so i left, and eventually went to my void deck to study. but its still damn unproductive. at home, i kept daydreaming and sing to the mirror. downstairs, i was just appreciating and falling asleep as the rain embraced me. damn damn damn! i really need to study! then i came home and watched ren wo au you.

yeap. well, secondary 4 is totally.. well, let's not say yet its very different cause right now i can't feel it. my brain hasn't even processed the fact that its january 2011 already! i think it will hit when cny comes, cause that means feb. which means, 2 months into a new year. definitely that will be in my head. homework and tests and study wise, definitely must turn it up 1000 notches. O's this year (again, i still haven't come to terms with it yet), cannot afford to be slacking/unmotivated. so yup. but my actions are totally contradictive of my words la. haiyo!

choir. it suddenly just whams into my face. choir prac has already turned up one million notches without me noticing. i only started to notice when we went into intense, kisenai and hura hoj filled practices. just these 2 songs you know. i guess we've been slacking too much in 2010. that's why its hard to get back on track. but no matter, syf's in april. can't afford to slack off either! hopefully our choir will be motivated to learn and excel and hopefully we'll get a gold with honours!!! wooooohooo! but right now.. kisenai is a total mess and @ speed 180 how do we even emode?!

so i guess that's all. the drop in posts in significant numbers of my friends' tumblrs and blogs just reminded me that its 2011 and i'm already 16. (god i feel old!) and 16 just means O's. ha! sweet sixteen indeed.

ok byebye i'll probably not blog as often either! time to eat dinner then bathe then chem!!

2011-01-02T21:16:00.002+08:00

oh man.. someone needs to tell me that they screwed the chinese o's as well... omg this is freaking scary. im so scared!! i screwed chinese paper last year!! and results are coming out!! i really want an A1!!! :((( oh no oh no oh no i know its too late now but i really really dont wannt get A2 or a freaking B!!!!!!!!

i know its not good to start 2011 with such a post, but if you say this is going to affect my 2011 prospects and luck, i'm not gonna believe it. cause 2011 is important. and it. is. in. my. hands. !!! im going to mug and mug until i feel like i pushed my furthest boundaries and put in 100000000000%.

but anyway! back to chinese o's! omg how does the sec 4s keep it in!! its crazy!! i know i screwed paper 1 so... and paper 2 was hard!! omg!!!!

2011-01-02T01:08:00.002+08:00

happy new year to all readers!! :D

hope that 2011 would be a much prosperous and happier year for all of you!! yeap, just take care of your body cause health is number 1 (oh god i sound like some ah ma) then make sure you spend a lot of time with your family!! cause 2011 is the year of family!!! :D

yeah, you may be wondering why i didn't post on the 1st. i ttly hate that :( but i was at downtown east for the new year. i should be still there now, but i came back early. hahaha so yeap! anyway, the 1st 2 shocking earth shattering news or information i found out:

1. Lord Voldemort, or Tom Marvolo Riddle, was 71 years old when he battled against the 17 year old Harry Potter. like OMG can you freaking imagine that?! he was born on the 31st of december 1926. they fought in 1997.

2. this person... tumblr: http://fredandgeorgeweasley.tumblr.com/ watched deathly hallows part 1 91 times. are you freaking serious?! that's amazing! but at the same time.. scary!!

anyway i brought my laptop to chalet, and did my 2010 reflections. i wanted to do it on this blog, but i couldn't access internet and thank god i didn't, cause it was damn long. hahaa and personal. so yeah! hope you guys did your own reflections as well (hahahaha) and hopefully aspire 2011 to be a much greater year! and may DH2 beat avatar as the highest grossing film of all time! peace!

2010-12-30T00:13:00.001+08:00

this is the saddest story i've ever read about harry potter. it's fanfiction but seriously its damn sad. it really made me cry. HP fans should really read it. i mean, its not true (cause Ron did not die in the HP books) but the author is really damn good.

http://www.fanfiction.net/s/600865/1/Because_of_Me

2010-12-28T00:25:00.002+08:00

ok 3 things.

1. i bought the Harry Potter MYStamp collection!! omg its $69.90! i looked through it and got so happy ^^ its like this glow and simple happiness in my chest. just looking at rupert in those stamps and the background makes me really happy ^^ well definitely it wasn't worth 70 bucks cause its just some stamps, but stuff like these always cost a lot more, so i'm not complaining ;) hhehe i was so scared there was no more stock!!

2. i just found out that Lily and James Potter gave birth to Harry when they were 20 years old. huge shock right smack in my face!! 20 years old is damn young!! its like just 3 years after hogwarts! (ron and hermione didn't give birth until they were 25 years old!) and omg, they died when they're 21!! tragic! 1960-1981 if any of you are interested.

3. 13 years and 3 days ago, ron heard hermione's voice come out of the deluminator. that's freaking cool!! omg!

ok yeah going to blog tomorrow i think. gonna be a long one. either tmr or any time this week :) anyway, hope you guys had a really merry christmas!! presents can be forgotten, but as long as you have your parents (and siblings), you're lucky and should be happy!

2010-12-24T18:45:00.003+08:00

merry christmas everybody!

p.s: note that there are 12 pictures ^^

p.s.s: just a little christmas present for all my readers! :D

2010-12-20T23:27:00.002+08:00

350th post! ahh watched rupert's interviews on youtube today. hahaha he's really one of a kind! anyway was on the HP forum and yeah they were discussing DH1 and DH2. im really thinking whether i should catch deathly hallows 1 again before i start secondary four. and ahh i think no matter what next year im gonna catch DH2 on the freaking 1st day. i know prelims will be near but i should study for it way ahead so.. ya. omg july 15th ^^ excited like hell now. and the kiss between ron and hermione better be good. we fans waited damn long time for this. hahaha and ron and hermione's romance is the or one of the biggest and most impt in the series so yeah ^^ but well david yates said it was 'hell of a snog' so yay! and i think i'll be too busy next year to actually think about DH 2 in the middle. what with syf and o's and all. but nonetheless, DH2 will certainly be a motivation and act as something glowing and luminous in my mugging life next year!

yup! so end of 2010. time to do some year end reflections and new year resolutions. hahaha not now though. look forward to it next time then! hahah anyway in the mean time, you can watch this :D i swear this guy is the cutest i've ever seen yet. hahah

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ErMWX--UJZ4

i love his first note. hahahahaha!

2010-12-19T19:37:00.000+08:00

vote for ron and hermione!! :D

http://www.buzzsugar.com/Best-Movie-Romances-2010-12473022

yeap!

2010-12-19T02:18:00.002+08:00

ahh watching harry potter and the philosopher's stone on HBO really made me want to watch the whole harry potter series again!! :@ especially half blood prince. and rupert grint was reallly so cute!! omg and i think PS is one of the funniest film among the others.

anyway...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vfu-ryPZrEA

HP stars at such a young age, @ HP 2. i love rupert's crazy laugh at 6:47. it never fails to get me laughing as well. hahahaha!

2010-12-18T15:11:00.002+08:00

shit man, the hacking cases are really getting to me.

last night i had a dream about being hacked again. so i started out in this coffee shop (its like a square) and i just got money from this customer lah. (i served him food i think) then i went back to the shop and stand. then after that, i forgot some, but its just 2 of my shop pple (gangstery ah beng looking for trouble guys) started looking for trouble with the man i just served. saying what: come lah come laH! take the knife lah! or sth like that. and i saw the man's expression, which was a total look of agression and unable-to-contain-myself-any-longer kind. i knew this was going to lead to hacking so i quickly place the bowl down on the shop platform and walked/ran out of the shop. the man saw me, but he proceeded to kill those 2 guys in the shop 1st.

once outside, i ran. i made a turn and suddenly ended up running through this... you know towards the nearby macs from scgs corridor. the one after the construction work, with the shop houses and everything. yeah that corridor. and there were houses as well. but its like no matter how i run, i feel myself running damn slowly... and then i looked back, there was the man with the chopper. i rmbed feeling damn freaked out and running. and somehow i started running towards him...? yeah i guess i pretty much woke up then.

and then i was lying on my bed thinking, in my dream, (cause i was wearning this shirt then full body suspender kinda thing) i should have taken off the outer layer of clothing, put my hair down, take off my glasses and pretend to be a passer by. but im not sure whether he will still kill a passer by.

anyway yah, i hate writing dreams, its so hard to recount everything in full detail. aiya ok bye. and omg you know i woke up at 13:16 today. die man.

2010-12-18T01:55:00.002+08:00

oh man, i really hate it that my posts are all studies-related. but yeah, that's pretty much what's bothering my life right now. so ya, here.

this holiday, haiz, to be honest, i've not been up to any effective revision. i mean, i definitely revised, but just how many % of the tiny winy bit will be retained in my mind, i have no idea. (and omg i just looked at my desktop clock and its my aunt's bday today!) anyway yeah, i definitely did history and ss, let's hope they stay. i've not touched bio or lit. phy chem math amath's like.. roughly there or not even there kinda standard. so yup, 2 weeks left to secondary four. to hell, i guess i've to make full use of these 2 weeks! mug mug mug mug mug. im sorry im so dead ok. brrr

anyway i really got hooked up looking at tumblr for like 3h straight today!! omg lah, the HP tumblrs are so amazing and made me laugh like mad ^^ no news of rupert lately :( his website is almost all dead. but the HP forum are like bustling with life, all already counting down to HP2. hahaha, anyway seeing rupert grint just makes me happy ^^ even if its through the net. so yah, i can't explain how serious i've gotten myself into about him but im really proud to be his fan ^^ i really hope he hurries and starts filming for eddie the eagle and hopefully take on more film projects ^^ and praying that there would be shots from their epilogue re-shoots!! the 1st time round was quite horrible :/ i mean their make up and costume and all.

yup. anyway 6L gathering yesterday! woots! in the end not many turned up, although i think it was pretty.. ahh.. well not as fail as last time. we went to cdans to slack, bowl and then catch narnia. and then went back to plaza to play murderer. (omg xinni rocks the game and i sucked like shit) ate mos burger after that and daryl and i were like almost drunkands cause we were giggling and basically hyperventilating in the restuarant. hahah hopefully nobody has taken pictures of us and placed it on stomp :/

anyway yeah, 3 years into 6L going their own separate ways. and i have to admit that im quite proud we still manage to keep it altogether even after 3 years. some class didn't even last a month after psle! that being said, its hard not to face the facts; one of them being we were not as close as we were back in 07. but well, its inevitable. they've said sec. sch friends are more lasting, and i guess they're correct :/ being together at 11-12 years old was definitely a disadvantage because we haven't fully matured and actually go into emotions. unlike in the secondary school when all the raging hormones are running wild and teens basically learn how to cherish and love each other more. but no matter what, i'll still hold on to this thread of hope i've held since a long time ago! that 6L will continue to flourish and prosper (awkward phrase but whatever) and basically just keep in contact. and hopefully, my wish of all of us coming together at 22 years old might just be fulfilled :)

anyway pictures of the gathering are up on facebook thanks to zhenyun!

so yeap, i guess i'll be seeing you soon then! hopefully i'll get down and finally manage to pull off some damn effective revision/work for the next 2 weeks. and of course, not forgetting my unfinished homework! :/

2010-12-14T14:05:00.001+08:00

hello my friends :) go listen to this!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mAxUIjJrFKQ

ah. childhood memories flooding back in.

2010-12-11T03:06:00.002+08:00

i was feeling a little down today. well, not down. as in, no sadness. but just sian-ness. yet it isnt, cause i was entertained by the tv, like almost 4 hours straight! (i swear the freaking 9 o clock channel 8 show's plot is moving so freaking slowly!! its 5 episodes on and i only got the characters' background and whatsoever, and im sick of those actors trying to act cruel!! american gladiators was damn fun, and america's got talent was as amazing as ever! cheers to the magician! best one i've ever seen! and survivor was just.. wow like many twists!)

anyway yeah, back to main point. i didn't look at rupert the whole day, and its amazing how when i just log on (to the net) i can just get cheered up like immediately. seeing his face, his picture, his news. hahaha, i sound like a .. over the board fan. but whatever :) im glad that im his fan ^^ he's really good you know!! haiz i really can't wait to see him in DH2 and his further film stuff. now i really really wanna go to the UK!! aiyo ok i shall go reply brendy's tags and then sleep.

2010-12-07T23:22:00.000+08:00

tomorrow tomorrow tomorrow. i swear! i will finish. my. ss. tomorrow. i must!

2010-12-05T19:44:00.002+08:00

omg rupert grint had a haircut!!

source's from a tweet though, dunno whether is it true :/

well if he did, im sure it'll look damn good and hot on him ^^ the tweet says it made him look evil hahaha

2010-12-01T14:28:00.001+08:00

die die die im supposed to do history! but im on youtube!! for the past hour!!

2010-11-24T14:56:00.002+08:00

wait, now what?

there's gonna be a WWIII?!

anyway i found this:

sad right!

btw i'm not prepared to die.

2010-11-22T23:06:00.002+08:00

today.. haiz.

it really feels like a whole load of emotions really. unknown ones. its just in the subconscious part of me you know, like its just there. but nth happens.

i trusted my mum and told her something, but then.. the result wasn't what i expect. but its fine i think i would have done the same if i were a parent.

channel 8 8pm show was so sad even though i simply stole glances at it.

sudden pressure coming from next year. omg i really dont know how to deal with next year. eveline told me prelims this year started july 19, and HP part 2 is freaking coming out next july 15. im so screwed. i guess i wont be able to watch it on the 1st day :(

yeah and the freaking worry cause this few days i keep getting distracted and just spend my life on the laptop! i really need to stop!

and no wonder brenda never reply my tags :( shes in vietnam! haiz.

2010-11-22T11:54:00.002+08:00

OMG OMG OMG?!

I FOUGHT FOR MY DREAM AND I FREAKING WON SOMETHING!!!

LOL LOL LOL can you believe it?! how many people reads the new paper?! after i made those calls, i figured i probably won't get anything cause seriously there's almost 5million people in singapore, and even if new paper has little readers, there'll at least be like 1000 entries right?!

OMG SO THIS MORNING THEY FREAKING CALLED ME. THIS WOMAN. TELLING ME I WON. sad thing is, its not the HP merchandise one that i won :(( its preview tickets to this movie called 'the next three days'. its tomorrow 0.0 ok at 1st i thought preview tickets was for HP and the DH. hahahah, but whatever, i'm happy enough :D i won something because of HP!!

and well, i really hoped that i could get the HP merchandise CAUSE SINGAPORE DONT FREAKING SELL HP STUFF. but ahh well contented :)

2010-11-20T16:06:00.002+08:00

today, i fought for my dream.

*dramatic and glorious music please*

yup, you see, on new paper there were contests that requires you to either mail/call in your answers. and so i did! brilliant right! and if you win you'll get all kinds of HP stuff. hahah, i don't think i'll win though, i mean, how many new paper readers are there?! each call's 20 cents, i called 5 times (there were 3 questions but i screwed up one and just tikam-ed the other)

so yes! i hope i'll win! hahah, but not keeping my hopes too high.

anyway did i say that 2nd round of potter was alot more enjoyable than the 1st? not because of who i was with definitely, but i went with a better mind. and hoping to see it again next week!

2010-11-18T14:37:00.001+08:00

omg did i tell you that rupert grint's in asia?!??! he's in japan!!!!!!!!! like i think right now!!! WOOOOOHOOO! SAME CONTINENT!!

oh man i still cant believe i miss him when he was here in singapore during F1. ARGH!

2010-11-18T11:14:00.003+08:00

ok fine i overreacted. over-overreacted. i'm so ashamed! *faces down*

after reading many reviews about the DH film, i begin to really accept it. and those rupert fans really made it all like a million times better.

to be honest, yeah rupert totally rocked the film so :) going again tonight, i'm pretty sure it'll be a better experience!

haiyo, anyway my relatives (including my grandma) came over yesterday for lunch. and we were talking about names. so i asked my granny why i have a 'yi' (毅) in my name cause its usually for guys. and my grandma said (sth like) yah but it doesn't matter really. you kinda still turn out to be the person you will be (obviously she said this in chinese). and i felt so proud ^^ to have 'yi' in my name when its exclusive for boys. (IM A FEMALE BTW IN CASE YOU HAVEN'T NOTICE) its like proving to me the women can do what men does, and well, i love 'yi' alot anyway.

and the special thing about 'yi''s that it sorta runs in the family. like my oldest uncle's child (though i've never met their family before) started with yi, and then travelled down to my dad, who was the 2nd, with me and my bro (yi ling and yi feng respectively), and then to my 3rd uncle, whose kids were name li ling and yi jie. can't remember why li ling has no yi, but yah, li ling is a girl so maybe they didn't want to include it in. then my 4th uncle's children doesn't have yi inside because they're christians, so they need 'en' instead. so both my cousins ended up with jia en and jia min. (which is kinda common, unlike my name muahahaha)

and then the most shocking revealation yet! my granny told me that i would have gone the 'pei' line. cause my 1st uncle's daughter or sth has a pei in her name. guo pei ling. YUCK. wtheck is that?! seriously guo yi ling's really a thousand times nicer. and no offence to people with pei in their names (eg. peiyi if you're reading this) i don't mean that pei sucks, but it just doesn't suit my name. so all the mind i became prouder of 'yi'.

there you go, the origins of my name. yup. i'm kinda gearing up for HP tonight again, partially because i know its gonna be a more pleasant one now that i've cleared my thoughts, and also according to my aunt, we're going to have free popcorn, drinks, burger in the theatre as well. WOW hahaha not forgetting the tickets are free for tonight from my aunt's company.

ok yes see you! i'm still a hell of a rupert grint fan so no way you'll hear me stop ranting about him even thought i have a bad impression of DH1. for now.

2010-11-18T00:34:00.002+08:00

harry potter and the deathly hallows part 1 review.

well, what can i say. it was quite a disappointment. :'(

number one. alot of things were left out/unexplained. for those who watched it already: ever wondered why harry potter's wand suddenly just acted on its own accord and sent gold spells to voldemort's when he was on the run on sirius's flying motorbike? ever wondered how the always-making-trouble dursleys simply just leave without a grumble? ever wondered why harry, ron and hermione got caught in the cafe? the death eaters didn't just appear on their own, did they? ever wondered how harry, ron and hermione got caught, even after shaking off xeno lovegood? didn't everything seemed so lucky? had hermione not 'oh my god!' about the sword of godric gryffindor, had hermione or harry not made the connections with the deathly hallows, would they even be there? and omg, ever wondered why there was a patronus that led harry to the lake which contained the sword? seriously they should at least discuss why there was such a patronus or whoever decided to help them!

number two. the relationship between harry and ron = :( but before i go there, i have to admit that david yates did a damn good job and emphasising and highlighting on the trio's friendship and how the straining hunt for horcruxes affect each of them. ron and harry's bromance was sufficiently shown in the beginning, with ron being loyal to harry and persuading not to leave the burrow and etc. the fight was awesome. but when ron return, and he kills the locket. it felt such like a hasty affair; he got it out of the lake. 3 sentences. ron's killing the locket. i mean, shouldn't they discuss about it first? AND trust me, harry looked like he was totally expecting ron's return. immediately after he opened his eyes and saw ron, he said 'it was you!'. and ron's like, sth along the lines of it being obvious. i mean, i know we're looking at a biggest blockbuster in film history with freaking tight schedule, but at least leave some time for like, surprised or shocked or i-cannot-believe-this-but-omg-you're-here-and-even-though-im-not-gonna-admit-it-i-miss-you-like-heck kinda thing right?! ok then ron kills the locket.

visuals were good so yah. but after he kills the locket, WTHECK it was just.. 'right, see it this way, we have 3 more horcruxes to find'. WORST thing: that's said by ron. omg seriously he's supposed to be in a truma kind of state after witnessing all his insecurities coming to life. how is it possible that he can crack a joke then?! (which brings me to point number three) and harry simply just: ok great come on lets go home! and the end of that scene. heck, no hugs? no making up? i mean, they've been best friends for 7 years!! yes they are guys but guys do hug right -.- oh man, i was expecting so much from the silver doe scene. it was supposed to bring out ron's love for hermione, but it didn't really...

number three. deathly hallows part one practically became a comedy. -.- seriously alot of lines were funny, yah, but i can do better without. im really really grateful to steve kloves for taking such effort and making a point for ron to deliver all the funny lines, but seriously, the theatre's audience were literally laughing every freaking minute. once there were claps =.= this is dh man! i mean, yah, there can be funny moments, but they made it till it seems rupert's character was there just for comic relief. just to make everybody laugh. and.. it took the seriousness out of DH, which is, not fun. and ron's really supposed to mature, to grow up, to learn, and although rupert portrayed that perfectly well thank you very much, it didn't suffice :/ the comic one-liners seriously, kinda too much. either its me, or just the audience in a good mood.

ok im too demanding. i guess :/ i'm so disappointed at myself that i'm disappointed at DH :( i mean, im a HP fan, so.. i guess it all boils down to me reading the book. or HP readers watching the movie. i guess i just have to accept the fact that movies can never be better than books :/ its funny, many of those people i know who has watched it thought the movie was great, awesome, mind blowing. but i don't. so seriously i think im expecting too much that i didn't enjoy it :( (and note that my review is not exactly credible cause its ron-based.)

i'm so sad, most probably because of myself. i'm so confused, but what i know is, i need to have a bigger and a more open mind. i'm going again tomorrow with a different group of people, different audience, different theatre, and different mindset. i'm going to go there with an open mind, and watch DH the way other people watch it, instead of comparing it to my expectations of it. i'm going to appreciate ron and his comedic things, and other things that i found lacking today. i'm going to find a way to accept and understand why a particular scene was portrayed this way and all. but i'm going to enjoy myself, that's most important. (so i'm going to look at rupert whenever i can)

right obviously there are good things in this movie. so ya

number one. i love how DH started, like separately, first with hermione, then harry, then ron. all of them showed different expressions of how they're going to deal with leaving their family, and it really heightened the magnitude of the horcrux hunt. it makes me feel connected, and i understand them.

number two. as it was somehow hinted earlier, i love the development of the trio's friendship, besides the ron and harry one after ron returns. i mean, all through the movie, you witness them caring for each other, and just being sibling-ly intimate. they understand each other's thoughts, and are worried for ron when he starts to swerve off the rail. then when ron leaves, although it might hint at harry and hermione getting together in the end, it wasn't really exactly the case cause you can totally see how hermione misses ron and how harry attempts to cheer hermione up by asking for a dance. and then you see how they can't manage without ron. but after that, when they 'accept' ron's departure and speaks to each other, you can see their sibling-ly relationship. so i guess, that's the good one :) and then, when ron returns, he desperately tries to get into hermione's good books. it was slightly too comical, but good otherwise :) and the relationship between ron and hermione was still quite subtle, but it makes it all clearer. (omg did i just contradict myself) i mean, there are more and more hints and actions by both of them that they have feelings for each other, and because of this, even when ron leaves, the train doesn't go the harry/hermione way. that's good cause i'm a R/Hr fan myself.

number three. torture scene. well, i would really really really have loved for ron to be screaming like shit for hermione, but even without it, it was still quite good. you can actually still see ron's worry for hermione, and you can sense that he could have lost his control if the torture drags on any further. and emma's acting was good. with helena bonham carter (bellatrix). it really makes people feel scared for her, although i must admit hearing her scream was abit.. unused to, cause hermione doesn't really scream in past movies. yup, and bellatrix was amazing. haha, tom felton was funny.

ok i feel so much better now after listing out the good points. now i seriously feel like an ass cause i'm being way too demanding. and i'm on HP forums now - those people who watched it really gave good reviews, saying it was mind blowing and damn grown up. oh man i feel so ashamed. ... why didn't i enjoy it like the others did?

ahh thank god i've got another chance tomorrow. i'm really gonna make it damn good this time. surely HP can't be that bad. and omg i make it sound as if loving HP was a quest.. but no! it isn't! i'm going with an open mind, and hopefully, it will bring out the 5 stars of DH1. :/

for readers who have read till here, thank you and hope you guys still go watch HP despite my discouraging remarks. you might have a different impression of me now, but just know that the author of this blog is being kinda a jerk (it can be used for females right, cause i don't wanna use the b word) right now, finding everything unsatisfactory. plus, the movie in fact really had alot other small clips and snippets that is good, so ;)

andandandandand i just can't believe how sexy rupert's voice is. seriously, as compared to dan's high, froggy pitch and emma's feminine voice, rupert's one is really.. the best. its deep and just so him. rupert's voice seriously surpasses everything. please please please take note of him in DH. he's really damn awesome, despite all the negative stuff i've wrote. i tend to be on both sides alot.

2010-11-16T21:58:00.002+08:00

the epic last blog post before the author goes on to watch deathly hallows!!

omg i just watched Ron's and Harry's fight scene again. its so damn damn damn good. rupert is freaking awesome, i really can't wait to see more of his acting tomorrow, and the fight itself. haha and the whole movie actually.

anyway its the 332nd post now, so shall leave 333rd for deathly hallows ;)

had great fun today at kirsten's house. doing empire state of mind and the HP thing (which can conveniently be found on youtube! :) ) laughed like crazy hahaha anyway yah we should do the food one soon. heheh

ya ok see you guys im so freaking excited! actually no lah, but i think i'll be by tomorrow. muahahha! and rupert really looks fine everywhere. i'll be creating a tumblr soon! (i hope)

2010-11-15T23:58:00.003+08:00

are you guys like this as well? you don't like music stopping abruptly, so you actually go and turn down the volume gradually until it disappears? if not music stopping abruptly gives you an uneasy, disturbed feeling?

on the other hand, NOOOOOOOOOO! WHY IS HARRY POTTER SEATS BEING TAKEN UP SO QUICKY! I HAVEN'T BOOK MY TICKETS YET!! AND I WANT A GOOD SEAT!! *prays that shujun replies by tomorrow morning!!*

2010-11-14T15:29:00.001+08:00

NO NO NO WHY DID THEY CHANGE HP RELEASE DATE TO THE 17TH?!?! NOW I WON'T BE WATCHING IT ON THE 1ST DAY ANYMORE!!

AND NOOO NOW I WANT TO BUY TICKETS FOR THE 17TH! AHHH

2010-11-13T20:05:00.003+08:00

ok look at this

dammit man he looks so good! i love this photographer!

5 more days 5 more days! please!

2010-11-12T21:22:00.004+08:00

ok hi! i'm back!

was mugging for chinese o's. chinese o's on wednesday was abit of a let down :( paper 1 was kinda bad for me. esp gong han, i totally dunno what happened. its like my brain was in a mental block and i couldnt squeeze anything out. and i finished the whole thing on the dot. well, not exactly finished cause my baozhangbaodao's ending was so bad. haiz, paper 2 mcqs were alright, but open ended was equally bad and i'm totally not confident for it at all. i just really really want an A1! :( but i'm not sure whether i'll even get a A!

anyway!!!!!!! ENOUGH OF THE EXAMS STUFF CAUSE HOLIDAYS IS OFFICIALLY HERE! last day of extended curriculum today :D woohoo! 6 freaking days to harry potter. i can't believe it. its gonna be so damn epic. even emma watson said herself she was blown away by the awesoomeness of deathly hallows. i'm totally gonna watch more than once. i wanna help DH beat avatar. actually, it doesn't even need help! it is going to beat avatar. or at least titanic.

omg seriously i spent dunno how long today sitting right in front of my laptop, going through like.. 80 forum pages. deathly hallows just had their world premiere yesterday in london!! i couldn't join in with the rest in the LIVE one cause its midnight (++) here when its night there. and damn damn damn rupert grint loooks damn hot in a suit!!!!! he really should wear suits more often, and his hairstyle is damn goood! arghh he's so lovely!! and god he has a damn sexy voice! seriously its so deep and just so light, but when it resounds around your ears it really gives you goosebumps and i felt so blissed and happy with the whole world when i listen to him in HP films or his interviews! i really love harry potter, cause without it, i wouldn't know rupert grint! omg lah ok just to share a little of my boy with ya ;)

anyway last day of school today so went out with zing to plaza sing. it was seriously some anyhow decision lah. we just decided to 'hey let's get on this bus!' and then off we went. and while on 700, we decided to go plaza sing. there weren't any nice movies. initially wanted to watch flowers but it was too ex (cause it was at 5) so we decided to watch megamind!

seriously the. movie. ROCKS. its so damn good!l! seriously its one of the best movies i've ever watched! its has all the elements of moving, good VS evil, adrenaline rush, unexpectancy, and just loving every character themselves. seriously don't be fooled by the trailer. at first when i watch megamind's trailer on tv i thought this show was gonna suck, but no no no seriously its more than a 4 star film. i'd recommend everyone to watch it. and its really really nice, although some parts does feel similar to meet the robinsons but its unique on its own!

anyway ok had enough for one post! enjoy your holidays friends!

i really really love listening to covers done by anybody in the world. somehow i prefer them so much to the electronised real things on discs. i guess its pretty much the rawness and innocence that those people have as compared to polished and trained singers.

everyday life

2010-10-29T17:45:00.002+08:00

ok this is something what i call blog worthy. (and yes that means whatever i've been posting had been crap)

so today after leaving bpp and taking the bus home, i walked to my void deck and waited for the lift! there was somebody there already so i simply sat down on the bench and waited. and waited. and waited. and then another person came along. (that makes 3) and the lift simply stayed at lvl 4 the whole damn while. i believed i waited for almost 3-4 minutes ok!

so no matter how long i waited, it stayed at lvl 4. with its arrow pointing up. i did consider walking to the other side of the HDB and take the next lift. however, i was curious to see what was going on on lvl 4. so up and up i climb and ha ha ha guess what i saw.

one lady (and my my this lady in my impression is the most gossipy auntie there can be in the entire universe) standing outside the lift, talking to another in the lift. WOW just wow! seriously do you know how many people i met while climbing up? numerous, and i bet they gave up waiting for the lift and decide to use the stairs. freak man, hahaha, i'm not pissed because i really loved the weather, like it was all windy and the sky was dark. and i loved it. im drifting off.

so yah i'm just amazed at how this can still happen. i mean, all along i thought it was just existent in channel 8 dramas! and guess what i witness for myself today!

anyway, instead of using the lift to go to my floor from the 4th floor, i decided to climb all the way to the 12th floor! (gasps -.-) hahaha, i take it as i completed my training for GE walk. but the fact's that i really wanted to climb the stairs for a very long time now.

and wow i'm not even tired! i'm here furiously punching my fingers on my laptop recounting the what-happened-to-me-20-min-ago story! woohoo!

ok nvm lazy liao off to bathe. i stink!

2010-10-28T21:48:00.002+08:00

zz, the hilda in amazing race asia just makes me so pissed! what's up with her man! 1st, complaining about her foot for almost all the races since race no. 1. 2nd, getting mad at her husband and getting him to carry both bags! (seriously how heavy is each bag?!) and 3rd, well ok this is understandable so i'm not going to say it.

ok lah whatever not pissed anymore. just feeling abit wtheck is wrong feeling. omg lah life is so complicated.

hail hail! i finally finished history! it was so tiring :( and extended curriculum starts tomorrow, so :/

2010-10-24T19:21:00.003+08:00

sup :)

i was looking at my october 2008 posts and realised... how much i've changed! seriously, the way i talk last time is kinda irritating and unbearable when i read it just now! its so.. ugh childish. hahah and the stuff that i talk about too. ahh well, decided not to read anymore 2008 posts cause i dont wanna suffer and be disgusted with myself.

anyway if you wanna know where the HP mania began for me, go to october 27, 2008 post! hahaha the future is so unpredictable.

anyway, im beginning to dread GE run now. shit lah, should have never signed up for it. i rmbed in sec 1 i was so freaked out by GE run, but these few weeks i'm just whatever lah, im gonna walk the 5km. but now! ohman, 5km is really alot! i'll take damn long to finish!! oh no man, should i just start training (for a week) or just let it be? and take who knows how long to walk the 5k? ahhhh nooooooo

yeah im done with 2 seqs ^^ i came up with a strategy. every morning before flag raising, i'll sit in the courtyard, and while talking to friends, i'll do the seqs. its due on friday, so i guess i'll have enough time to finish if i add on some at home. haha its so hilarious, the whole of 4 seqs by right should be done in 80 mins, but i'm taking way longer.

omg i find that i'm talking loads of redundant stuff. lots of daily stuff. ah! ok bye lah nth to say liao. and wooohooo i found myself another faithful reader!! (KIMBERLY CHAN!!) :D

2010-10-22T21:39:00.002+08:00

as much as i believe history's my favourite subject (but by no means the one that i score the best in), its pretty impossible to ask for 4 SEQs and 1 set of SBQ from me, cause seriously, its freaking after the end of years, and even though i didn't do well, i think i need my rest!

ahh im so whiny and complainy and shitty!

2010-10-21T19:35:00.002+08:00

ok, iSCmun wasnt so bad! kudos to ah cheng, sam, junlei, cla, kym and rachel!

hahah, being in The Philippines is really.. nothing to do. hahha, we just sit there in the KA for all 8 hours?! but it was fun lah, looking at people going up and 'debate' but it does gets boring after awhile. it was those unmoderated breaks that were fun. haha, we moved around and talked blah. at first was feeling abit bored, so i just sat there with kiran and gwen. but after lunch, moved around to shujun/ruoning. and also to seah YL and kailin. apparently kailin's heart flutters whenever i speak. awwwww!! laughed alot with her.

ok ya. tomorrow presenting for PW. weeeee hope people will laugh at our NGs. and oh receiving EOYs results stuff. screw it man. i dont wanna look at it :( ahh okok needa do history soon. at 8! ya ok byebye.

and i'm actively updating this orange blog because i know blogging got some of my faithful readers back!! hintbrendahintyanruhint. hahha ya ok bye i zao liao.